12 things we failed to export

• Queuing • A decent cup of tea • Socks in sandals and knotted hankies on heads (thank goodness) • Weather obsession • The art of making appetising sausages • Black humour and Blitz spirit • Fish and smelly vinegary chips (apart from on the Costa Del Sol) • Self-deprecation • Pony Club mothers • Tasteful, moving pageantry that doesn’t involve cheerleaders and pom-poms • The Bramley apple—it doesn’t fit overseas processing machinery —and crumble (they’ve no idea) • A reluctance to use the direct negative. The world wonders why we can’t just say ‘no’