‘DADDY, why are they burning a man in a wheelchair?’ No, not the latest Izal snuff video, but one of the attractions at a Winter Wonderland event in Bedfordshire. This year it was the turn of Woburn Abbey to disappoint parents and children alike. The burning wheelchair was part of the Luminaries Woburnensis event, which has been denounced as ‘pathetic’ and ‘absolutely disgraceful’. After queuing for 90 minutes and paying £10.50 to get in, families were treated to a shambolic display of melting ice sculptures, lanterns made out of cheap candles in paper bags, a few fairy lights and a bubble machine which broke down. The climax of the show was setting light to an effigy in a wheelchair. A nice touch, no doubt, but what’s that got to do with the festive season? It happens every year, somewhere or other, yet people still get suckered in. A couple of years ago, the Lapland Adventure in the New Forest resembled a cross between an illegal gipsy site and a downmarket garden centre. Fights broke out between parents, Father Christmas and his elves, and the ‘reindeer’ were donkeys with fake antlers tied to their heads. Last year’s Christmas extravaganza in Milton Keynes featured an ‘ice rink’ made out of a plastic sheet and a grotto ‘which smelled vaguely of urine’. You’d think by now, most people would have worked out that it’s advisable to give these tacky, two-bob Winter Wonderlands a wide berth. Yet still the punters turn up, more in hope than expectation. Burning a man in a wheelchair? What will they think of next year — a beheading?