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MOTHERS & DAUGHTERS

OUR columnist suggests novels to help with trickier times. THERE is a poignancy to Mother’s Day. For some, yesterday would have been a celebratory day, heralded by a cup of tea in bed. But for the motherless, especially the recently bereaved, it must be a bittersweet experience to be reminded of one’s loss.

My own mother, who lives at the opposite end of the country, received flowers. Still, it’s not the same as seeing her in person.

Mother-daughter relations have proved a rich seam for novelists. In Louisa May Alcott’s Little Women, the ever-patient Marmee seems a paragon, but is quick to reassure hot-headed Jo that she has worked to curb her temper.

Her foremost ambition for her daughters is happiness. ‘I’d rather see you poor men’s wives, if you were happy, beloved, contented, than queens on thrones, without self-respect and peace.’

The gloriously off-kilter Where’d You Go, Bernadette, by Maria Semple, features a markedly different American matriarch.

Bernadette Fox was once a cult architect, but is now a morass of bitter insecurities.

Teenage daughter Bee lovingly recalls the primary school trip on which Bernadette told children: ‘I’m going to let you in on a little secret about life. You think it’s boring now? Well, it only gets more boring. The sooner you learn it’s on you to make life interesting, the better off you’ll be.’

When Bernadette disappears, Bee never loses faith. ‘When things are bad, there’s nobody better to have in your corner than mom.’

In Deborah Levy’s Hot Milk, adrift twentysomething Sofia agrees to accompany the mysteriously-ill Rose to southern Spain for an experimental treatment.

Their relationship is tricky. ‘My love for my mother is like an axe. It cuts very deep,’ reveals Sofia.

But as these novels show, a mother should never be taken for granted.