Ephraim Hardcastle

REFLECTING on his 28 years on BBC TV’s Have I Got News For You, comic Paul Merton says his worst experience was when (ex-Tory MP) Ann Widdecombe hosted it for a second time (in 2007). He tells Radio Times: ‘Second time she comes on she’s telling the producer what jokes will and won’t work. She turned to me at one point and said, “Come on, be amusing – that’s what you’re being paid for.” Even as I say it, it sends a shiver through my heart! It’s like, the arrogance of the woman, you know? Suddenly she thought she was Victoria Wood!’ Can the old girl have been that bad? NOW appointed to Labour’s national executive committee, transgender comedian Eddie Izzard, 56, hopes to become the first (openly) cross-dressing MP. Might he rise further? Twitter gossips wonder if Eddie – who says he’s considered having a D-cup breast implant – could become Labour’s ‘first female leader’. KNOWN for his portrayal of loveable rogue Claude Jeremiah Greengrass in the TV series Heartbeat, actor Bill Maynard, who has died aged 89, was an energetic womaniser who sometimes conducted four affairs simultaneously during his 34-year marriage to first wife Muriel. A friend says: ‘After being caught once too often, in the early Sixties, he gave her a list of all the actresses he’d slept with. When she saw one of them on TV, Muriel would blow a raspberry and remark: “She’s getting fat!” or, “Oh no, not her – where’s your taste?”’ His 1989 marriage to speed ace Donald Campbell’s widow, Tonia, was dissolved. TAKING advantage of the fact that the Queen doesn’t address the nation at Easter, Prince Charles made a Good Friday speech about persecuted Christians abroad. Beside him was a bowl of flowers and two photos, pictured – one of himself and the Queen, the other of him cuddling Camilla. ‘There’s nothing accidental about the photos being there,’ suggests a royal source. ‘They signify his determination that Camilla will be crowned.’ FORMER first minister of Scotland Alex Salmond is criticised for his controversial role as a presenter on Putin-backed RT, aka Russia Today. Radio presenter Iain Dale remarks: ‘I’ve just had a press release to inform me that his star guest this week is (ex-Liberal Democrat MP) Lembit Opik. Need I say more?’ Oh dear! JEREMY Clarkson, 57, a crony of former prime minister David Cameron, says of Theresa May and Jeremy Corbyn: ‘Do we want a madwoman with silly shoes or a man who appears not to like Jewish people?’ He adds: ‘Whereas, when we were given someone whether we liked it or not, we got the Queen. And that hasn’t worked out too badly, has it?’ Is Jeremy’s gong overdue?