I CAN’T BEAR THOUGHT OF HER LEAVING

Dear Coleen

My only daughter is about to go off to university and I’m heartbroken.

I was told I’d never be able to have children but eventually I got pregnant with her when I was 41.

I’ve doted on her ever since and we have a brilliant relationship. She’s smart, beautiful, kind and funny and she’s like my best friend.

She’s got a place at university and is due to start next month and while I’m so proud of her, I already have empty nest syndrome. I can’t sleep and I keep having anxiety attacks at the thought of her going away.

She will be 200 miles away and I can’t bear the thought of not seeing her every day. I know I should pull myself together but I can’t.

Coleen says

I feel your pain. It’s so hard. My daughter is 15 and she’s going into her last year of school in September – so I know how you feel having empty nest syndrome.

Once they’ve left, kids still come home when they need you but it’s not the same.

But you must remember to pat yourself on the back. You’ve raised an independent, smart young woman who you have a great relationship with and who has a great future ahead of her. That’s all down to you. And you’re lucky because now there’s social media, mobile phones and Skype, you can stay in touch so easily. It’s not like the old days where you’d have to wait for her letters or she’d have to queue up to use the pay phone.

Be honest with her – tell her how proud you are of her, but also explain that you’re dreading her going away because you’ll miss her.

You must be feeling a bit redundant, but focus on your life and what you’d like to do.