Pretty slim chance of signing up for a health kick
JAMIE Oliver has created a series of recipes and tips for Tesco, which will include making super-healthy food from scratch.
Bad move. Apparently some of these recipes will make you slim enough to get through the security bars he’s currently installing at his house.
Yes, big Jamie chased and pinned down a man after he’d attempted to burgle the celebrity chef’s house in north London.
The burglar didn’t have a chance – as he was full of turkey twizzlers at the time.
Talking of runners, many thousands have been praised for taking part in this year’s Great North Run.
Seeing sweaty folk in their pants staggering around on the streets of Newcastle on a Sunday morning is nothing new, of course. The only surprise this time is that it wasnae a stag do.
We should all be on a health kick, apparently.
Britain’s most senior public health official claims that drinkers should concentrate on having two alcohol-free days a week.
Now comes the hard part. Deciding what week we’re going to have those two days in.
Maybe we should just take on the builders’ attitude. Research has found they spend nearly two years of their working lives eating lunch, six months making tea and nearly a year hunting for the right tool.
And if you don’t know what the right tool is, turns out it’s the person who hired them.
RECIPE TO BE BURGLED Jamie Oliver