HOW MUCH IS A PINT OF MILK?

BRUCE DERN

Empire (UK) - - PRE.VIEW - DAN JOLIN

On a scale of one to ten, how fa­mous are you?

Well, I’d say I’m in the top million. I mean I’m not gonna give my­self ac­co­lades be­yond that, for Christ’s sake.

What one thing do you do bet­ter than any­one else you know?

Noth­ing! I guess I have a great me­mory, but other than that, er… As they say, good movies, like good soc­cer, it’s all about ev­ery­body pulling their oar. That’s what I’ve al­ways tried to en­cour­age.

Have you kept any sou­venirs from a movie shoot?

I kept one from Alexan­der Payne’s Ne­braska: a lit­tle wooden cut-out of the state Ne­braska. That movie meant a great deal to me.

Do you have a favourite joke?

That’s print­able, you mean? Uh... Well, I have one favourite say­ing, which kind of sums it all up to me: when you come to a fork in the road, take it.

When were you last naked out­doors?

Last night, when I jumped in my pool, be­cause it’s 104 here to­day. Can you be­lieve they’re hold­ing the World Cup in Qatar? What the fuck is that?!

What was the first prize you ever won?

In run­ning I won a lot of awards when I was in school, but the first prize that ever meant any­thing to me: 1972, I won the Na­tional Film Crit­ics Award in Amer­ica for Best Sup­port­ing Ac­tor for a movie called Drive, He Said, that Jack Nicholson di­rected. They took it to Cannes and Jack was al­ways up­set that it didn’t have a kind re­cep­tion there, be­cause Mick Jag­ger’s baby cried all the way through it. [laughs]

How much is a pint of milk?

Well, I’m not a big milk drinker. I was forced, like we all were when we were lit­tle, es­pe­cially dur­ing the Se­cond World War, we had to drink a lot of milk. But I don’t know the price of it and I re­ally don’t give a shit. [laughs] At the same time, I love choco­late malted milk­shakes.

Which film have you seen more than any other?

I would say Lawrence Of Ara­bia is first, Amadeus se­cond. I think Lawrence was prob­a­bly the best movie I ever saw, be­cause it was bril­liant in ev­ery de­part­ment.

Have you ever know­ingly bro­ken the law?

Well, I’ve sped in a car. Although I’ve never gone triple dig­its. I’m just a wuss that way. I run, and I’ll set­tle for five, six, seven miles an hour. I’m 82 years old, for God’s sake!

When were you most starstruck?

I was starstruck a lit­tle bit by Bette Davis. I just felt she was a class act. My se­cond movie was Hush… Hush Sweet Char­lotte, and I was in a flash­back se­quence where I was her young man and we were danc­ing to­gether, and her fa­ther, who hated me for some rea­son, felt that he needed to chop my head and my hand off.

What’s your favourite word in the English lan­guage?

Fair­ness. I think that to me is the best word in the lan­guage that I’ve come across so far.

Do you have any tat­toos?

No, sir. But in 1980 I did a movie with Maud Adams called Tat­too. In the movie I play a tat­tooist, and she said, “I’d like one of those,” and I said, “You come back to­mor­row af­ter you’ve thought about it.” “Well, why the de­lay?” “Just re­mem­ber one thing, ma’am: it goes one-eighth of an inch be­neath the skin and is for­ever.” [laughs]

Is God a man with a big white beard?

I think there is a God, I’m very doubt­ful he has a big, white beard. I don’t know it’s a him... My only the­ory is that if you feel spir­i­tual in one way or an­other, you’re not go­ing to ac­com­plish your goals in a build­ing. Some­where out­doors, wher­ever your spirit is, it’s out there.

THE SEN­A­TOR IS OUT ON 13 AU­GUST ON DOWN­LOAD AND ON 20 AU­GUST ON DVD

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