PASSNOTES

F1 Racing (UK) - - INSIDER -

Your es­sen­tial F1 briefing #No 22 Se­crecy

Pssst… I am not! Keep it down. We’re talk­ing about se­crets. Se­crets? Sounds like the name of a pro­vin­cial night­club. Or that gar­den cen­tre with the café that charges the thick end of six quid for cof­fee and a slice of cake. Enough of your bour­geois Home Coun­ties pre­oc­cu­pa­tions – this could be a mat­ter of life and death… I bet it isn’t. You’re right. It’s not. Well I’m glad we got that set­tled. So, what news? From now on, teams’ tyre choices for each grand prix will re­main a se­cret un­til two weeks be­fore each race. Ye gods! Is this that new batch of tyre reg­u­la­tions? The one where I read two para­graphs and then had to lie down in a dark­ened room for an hour? The very same. Pirelli are in­tro­duc­ing a fifth dry-weather com­pound, the ‘ul­tra-soft’, and they will select three of them for each week­end rather than the cur­rent two. The teams then nom­i­nate which two of the three they in­tend to use – not nec­es­sar­ily mak­ing the same choice for both driv­ers – and com­mu­ni­cate that choice to the FIA, who tell Pirelli, so they know how many tyres to pro­duce. I can see your mouth mov­ing, but all I can hear is: “Blah blah blah blah blah.” And if a team misses their dead­line, the FIA will choose for them. I’m past car­ing. Can’t we play a game with sim­pler rules? Agri­cola? Strat­ego? Nude cha­rades? If any­thing I’d say this was more like rock, pa­per, scis­sors. Don’t you mean scis­sors, pa­per, stone? You say tomato, I say tomato… Let’s call the whole thing off!

Name Se­crecy Age Shhh! Ap­pear­ance It wears its na­ture like a ver­i­ta­ble cloak of in­vis­i­bil­ity Do say Get a grip Don’t say Don’t you think they’re get­ting Le Carré’d away with all this?

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