The Twin Boyfriends
Incest?! A new low!
Nooooo! OK, while we haven’t got a DNA test handy, we’re pretty sure these two aren’t actually related – although they certainly belong to the same tribe.
Why would you want to date someone who looks exactly like you?
Well, you know when you’re younger and practise kissing on your hand? Or you sometimes crack one out while glaring sweatily into a mirror? Well that’s all some people want.
Well at least their personalities will be different, right?
Um. Well. Yes! Absolutely! One of them, for example, doesn’t even like protein shakes! Vive la différence! (No. They’ll be the same.)
What they do?
Swap clothes, take the rap for one another’s parking offences, desperately worry the other is thinner/ more popular/better hung.
Who are their friends?
They tend to hang out in packs made up of other twinsets. Pop into some bars on a Saturday night and it’s like everyone is made from a mould of Ricky Martin – which has got slightly more misshapen with every iteration. They’re like magpies: look for one set and you’ll soon see another!
Who are their enemies?
Well – I’m assuming, once they’ve found someone willing to read this out to them – me. Anyone who questions their aesthetic.
Past boyfriends who found a hotter doppelgänger.
Will, er, they make good boyfriends?
They could be looking for a triplet to form a throuple, so go for it! But don’t even think about getting a haircut or dropping a jeans size without permission.
Am I a twin boyfriend?
Think you need to clean that mirror, honey.