Good Housekeeping (UK) - - Modern Relationships -

In the days that re­main, there’s no doubt our ‘sleep di­vorce’ can work – when we’re work­ing anti-so­cial hours, or con­versely when we’ve had a lovely evening to­gether, and don’t mind a bit of space. But though I’m gain­ing shut-eye, I miss rest­ing my head on Mat’s chest, feel­ing his heart­beat as I say, ‘What’s that rubbish you’re watch­ing?’ Now that the nov­elty’s passed, I feel blue go­ing to bed on my own; lonely wak­ing up to noth­ing but a pair of drawn cur­tains. Un­in­ter­rupted sleep may be a key factor in men­tal health, but I was hap­pier be­fore.

The month is up, and we’re both strangely ap­pre­hen­sive. Hav­ing tasted the bliss of a full night’s sleep, how will I feel about go­ing back to a shared bed? Short an­swer: re­lieved. Mat’s still there, as he’s al­ways been, and we set­tle into the old rou­tine (kiss good­night; bicker over du­vet man­age­ment). When, a few hours in, I’m wo­ken by his gen­tle snores, I no longer lie there rag­ing. I pre­fer it when he’s be­side me.

So how’s it go­ing now? In­spired by the GH sur­vey find­ing that 11% of those who sleep apart do so oc­ca­sion­ally, Mat and I have put some healthy flex into the bed­room. We still start every night to­gether, but if sleep eludes me, I’m quick to seek it in the spare room, grate­ful of the op­tion. I’ve made my bed, and I’m happy to lie in it. Mostly…

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