21st Century Boys
Can a man be a hashtag? Petal, it’s 2016; we’re ALL a hashtag. So what does the #instagay do? He snaps away, building that brand and aiming for as many likes as he can before bedtime, whereupon he’ll seconds before he goes to sleep, so he can secure some more while he’s out for the count. Where would I
In the gym, click-click-clicking away in the mirror, getting in everyone’s way, or hovering over carefully constructed lunches in hipster cafes, taking a #sneakypic. How will I recognise him? You’ll have seen him already on Instagram, of course. If you’re a beginner, keep an eye out for a pigeon-toed guy in immaculate shoes – “a gift from Nu Shooz boutique in Tamworth, thanx guys xxx” – being photographed by a terminally bored pal.
Who are his friends? Anyone willing to take his picture, people who comment “wooooo sexy!!!” on all his pics. Who are his enemies? Uggos, photobombers, anyone who serves him food that’s not photographable, people who use Would he make a good boyfriend? If you’re cool with 17,000 gays slavering over your man because he can’t go a day without taking a picture of himself in the shower, then maybe.
Most likely to say: #gaypicoftheday #instagay “Can you take it again?” Least likely to say: “Let me take a picture of you!” Am I an #instagay? Check the top Instagram. If the snaps outnumber everything else, then yes you are! Shall we take this one again?