Mr F is home and well

Harefield Gazette - - OPINION -

HIS tooth­brush is back in the bath­room, the wine is in the rack (though not to be drunk yet), and the news­pa­pers are pil­ing up.

All’s well with the world: Mr F is home!

Thank you for your mes­sages dur­ing the three weeks he has been in Hilling­don Hos­pi­tal which, along with the bril­liant staff of Jer­sey ward, have re­ally helped us through a hor­ri­ble time.

When did I re­alise Mr F was get­ting bet­ter? Prob­a­bly when he got ex­cited about eat­ing a jelly. Or maybe it was when he started call­ing the nurse who was dol­ing out his drugs ‘my dealer’. Luck­ily she saw the funny side too.

Ac­tu­ally, he has re­turned home with a moun­tain of pills in­clud­ing oral mor­phine with an ac­com­pa­ny­ing sy­ringe.

What? Had I got to in­ject him? No, thank­fully. It is a lit­tle pump to ac­cu­rately mea­sure the medicine which is swal­lowed, not in­jected. Phew.

His hair is shaggy, his beard needs trim­ming and he’s lost a stone in weight. We might envy his slim­ming suc­cess, but the rea­sons for his ‘diet’ – a burst ul­cer and an emer­gency op­er­a­tion fol­lowed by an in­fec­tion – is not to be rec­om­mended.

Still seething about my 999 call on March 29 which re­fused us an am­bu­lance (I have put in an of­fi­cial com­plaint) I read a news story which said a fifth of pa­tients turn­ing up to A&E have mi­nor ail­ments like ath­lete’s foot and head lice.

Most amus­ing – or alarm­ing – were the ones whose false nails were hurt­ing, or who were hun­gover, or had paint in their hair.

The anal­y­sis of data from 15 A&E units by con­sul­tancy firm IMS Health found that nearly 20 per cent of pa­tients had a ‘self-treat­able con­di­tion’. Oh dear…

AS WELL as cel­e­brat­ing Mr F’s re­turn home I joined an­other to mark 50 years since the birth of Hilling­don bor­ough which has seen Labour, Con­ser­va­tive and even hung coun­cils over the years.

OK, I was al­ready feel­ing tired and emo­tional but the com­ing to­gether at St Mar­garet’s Church in Uxbridge had a lovely com­mu­nity feel. Along­side Mayor Catherine Dann were rep­re­sen­ta­tives of many faiths, the RAF, Sa­mar­i­tans and a choir from White­hall Ju­nior School.

Plus this old Brum­mie Gazette hack who has cov­ered sto­ries about most of them for more than 20 of those 50 years – and is glad to have made Hilling­don her home.

Email bmail­bar­bara@gmail. com

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