Tortured veteran’s turnaround
Ex-soldier starts new life to beat horrors of war
A soldier has turned his back on his old life and is preparing to move across the world in a bid to halt the flashbacks brought on by post-traumatic stress disorder.
Dean Upson, from Maidstone, was a corporal with the Royal Engineers and witnessed the horrors of war in a 14-year career which involved service in Iraq and Afghanistan.
Now 36, he was just 17 when he walked into an army recruiting office. Operational work saw him serve in Macedonia, Kosovo and Northern Ireland.
His tours of duty saw him involved in the invasion of Iraq from after 2003, with Maidstone’s 36 Engineer Regiment stationed in Afghanistan in 2006 with the 33 Engineer Regiment (Explosive Ordnance Disposal) and again in 2008.
On his second tour of Afghanistan his role was to diffuse bombs and clear the way for medical emergency teams to work.
But he was struggling with the daily sights, and he said a common occurrence was rushing children to hospital who had been wounded by bombs.
He began to feel numb, and said: “I didn’t think things were real and I thought to myself ‘I’m lying’.”
He later tended to a young officer who had been shot in the head. His colleague later died.
He described this as “the moment that finished me off”, realising his army life was over.
Mr Upson, of Nutwood Close, was diagnosed with post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in 2009. That year also saw him make several attempts to take his own life. At the beginning of 2015, he was found unconscious by a member of the public after a third attempt.
“Had it not been for that person, I wouldn’t be here now,” he said.
PTSD is an anxiety disorder caused by stressful or frightening events and sufferers can experi- ence flashbacks and nightmares.
Mr Upson, a former pupil of Astor of Hever school, (now St Augustine Academy) was in Specsavers in Maidstone when a Gurkha walked in with an amputated leg.
He began struggling with his symptoms and became aggressive until police were called.
He said: “Amputees are a trigger for me and it just set me off.
“I understand my behaviour wasn’t the best, but I told them I had PTSD.”
Mr Upson left the Army in 2011 and was initially offered £30,000, by the Armed Forces Compensation Scheme. After more negotiations he was awarded £160,000.
He believes while the Army’s compensation scheme helps wounded soldiers and amputees, there is a lack of understanding around non-visible injuries.
Mr Upson’s salvation came when a friend introduced him to diving. He has sold all of his possessions and will be moving to Phi Phi Islands, Thailand, next month to become a diving instructor.
He said: “The first time I got in the water, I just sat at the bottom of the pool. It was peace. My head stopped. There are no sights, smells or sounds underwater that set off a trigger.”
PTSD is said to affect one-infive veterans. Mr Upson spoke out as research by The Independent shows the number of serving and ex-forces personnel being awarded compensation for mental disorders has increased from 121 in 2009-10 to 580 in 2015-16.
MoD officials say the scheme has paid £600 million since 2005 and helps veterans with physical injuries and mental health issues.