Dress sense – and sen­si­tiv­i­ties

Kentish Express Ashford & District - - Front Page -

THE se­cret of a good re­la­tion­ship, ac­cord­ing to the Amer­i­can come­di­enne Rita Rud­ner, is to let your part­ner be him­self – and you just pre­tend he’s some­body else. Which helps to ex­plain the mirth with which two of my fe­male friends dis­cuss first meet­ing their men­folk. “You should have seen him – he was wear­ing a black jumper with WHITE jeans!” one will hoot. “Tell me about it!” shrieks the other. “This one had been wear­ing the same den­ims from Ox­fam for NINE years!” (Well, I think, they still fit­ted, not bad for a man of my age, even con­sid­er­ing they were a size too big in the first place. And if our dress sense was so em­bar­rass­ing why the heck did they pair up with us in the first place?) Which in turn helps to ex­plain my sym­pa­thy for 60-yearold Peter Trig­ger, from Northamp­ton, who has been given an Asbo for wear­ing a skirt in pub­lic. Given that the bold transves­ti­cism of Grayson Perry and Ed­die Iz­zard usu­ally in­spires re­spect for their artis­tic in­di­vid­u­al­ity, I’d like to praise him as a true Bri­tish ec­cen­tric, ex­cept that he is ac­cused of do­ing it to frighten school­child­ren and spite his neigh­bours. The fashion fas­cists of Northamp­ton­shire failed, how­ever, with an at­tempted Asbo against 18-year-old El­lis Drum­mond, for adopt­ing the low-slung trousers from which many teenagers like to ex­pose their un­der­wear. Ap­par­ently this style is in­spired by the tra­di­tion­ally saggy waist­lines of Amer­i­can prison garb and, iron­i­cally, has ac­tu­ally been made il­le­gal in one Louisiana town. So you’re not al­lowed to sling low on the streets, in case you’re locked up – and then you can’t help it. I sup­pose those of us with nine-year-old den­ims should be grate­ful for hav­ing our own Trinny and Su­san­nah. Yet I could not re­sist a venge­ful smirk when my style coun­sel­lor en­tered her grey­hound in a dog show, and found her­self parad­ing next to the rear view of a ter­rier owner who ex­posed not even his Y-fronts but a bel­ter of a builder’s bum from his droop­ing, hip­ster jeans. Huh, what a dirt­bag. I bet he got them from Ox­fam.

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