Game for a laugh!

United fans We asked co­me­di­ans and Manch­ester who will both be ap­pear­ing ANDREW RYAN and IAN SMITH, this sum­mer, to share at the Ed­in­burgh Fes­ti­val Fringe later new sea­son... their thoughts with us ahead of the

Late Tackle Football Magazine - - COMEDY CAPERS -

1. What do you think of Jose Mour­inho?

Andrew Ryan: I think he is a tac­ti­cal ge­nius – and also very grumpy. He has done some re­ally good work with the play­ers he has, play­ing a way that he feels is right for them. Hope­fully, with about 3-4 sign­ings in the sum­mer he will get the squad where he wants it and next sea­son we will see a much im­proved team. Over­all, he is good for the club, knows how to win tro­phies, but I feel he could smile more and stop be­ing so neg­a­tive at times. Also, hav­ing a pop at the play­ers in the me­dia is not some­thing a man­ager should do at any level. Man-man­age the play­ers and don’t get the me­dia to give them a kick up the back­side.

Ian Smith: I re­ally like Jose – but he looks like a man who has walked in on his par­ents hav­ing sex and can’t get the im­age out of his head. I think he’s the man­ager United need, although I found it frus­trat­ing that he was talk­ing about in­juries and a de­pleted squad and when he even­tu­ally played the youth play­ers, they were all bril­liant. Cheer up, Jose! 2.Was last sea­son a suc­cess for Manch­ester United?

AR: Yes and no, per­for­mances have been bet­ter in terms of at­tack­ing play etc. Re­sults have been poor. But I feel we have moved for­ward and got some more be­lief. Cham­pi­ons League next sea­son is a big bonus, although get­ting in by the back door. It’s a bit like missing your train home then hav­ing to call your par­ents for a lift home.You get home, but you do it the eas­ier way. I want to win tro­phies but the League, Cham­pi­ons League and FA Cup. The rest are just for the fringe play­ers. I think so, yeah. Although clearly not a re­sound­ing suc­cess when I have to say,‘I think so’. Three tro­phies – well, two tro­phies and then a big sil­ver plate thing. Plus, the main aim was to get back into the Cham­pi­ons League and we did – via the most con­vo­luted, nail­bit­ing way. But Manch­ester United def­i­nitely need to be com­pet­ing to win the league and this sea­son we seemed ob­sessed with fin­ish­ing sixth. 3.What will be a suc­cess this com­ing sea­son?

AR: Top three and be within 3-5 points of the lead­ers with 4-5 games to go. A good run in the Cham­pi­ons League and the sea­son af­ter we should be win­ning the league.

IS: Be­ing the first team that al­lows play­ers to have um­brel­las when it’s rain­ing dur­ing a game. Com­pet­ing for the Premier League ti­tle and a good show­ing in the Cham­pi­ons League. We prob­a­bly need to buy a fair few play­ers to get the squad depth up to strength, or trust some of the young play­ers. 4.Who will be the team to beat?

AR: I think Spurs mov­ing ground is the worst pos­si­ble thing for them. Dif­fer­ent size pitch etc. Liver­pool are still pretty weak and I can’t see them step­ping up no mat­ter what play­ers Jurgen Klopp brings in. Man City, well they will im­prove as Pep gets to grips with the league and un­der­stands that Stoke away is an

ac­tual game and not an easy walk in the park. Chelsea will be there again and I think they will be the team to beat. Arse­nal are a team of play­ers that do noth­ing for me. In fact, if they went bank­rupt, I would not even no­tice.

IS: Hud­der­s­field.

5.Who’s the best player in the Premier League?

AR: So many good play­ers in lots of dif­fer­ent po­si­tions. I think N’Golo Kante or Harry Kane for me. To be hon­est, I could name so many but we all have dif­fer­ent opin­ions. But Kante is su­perb. Char­lie Adam. Phil Jones is the best at tak­ing cor­ners. It’s such a hard question - as a United fan I want to say Paul Pogba, but Alexis Sanchez and Eden Hazard have to be up there for re­ally lift­ing the teams they’re with. Oh… Harry Kane? He’s ab­so­lutely bang­ing them (goals) in sea­son af­ter sea­son. I’ll go with my first an­swer – def­i­nitely Char­lie Adam.

6.Were Arse­nal right to give Arsene Wenger a new con­tract?

AR: Yes, but they won’t win the league in the next two years. No bite in the club. Noth­ing about them tells me they are fight­ers. Hon­estly, it’s the best com­edy TV show on at the mo­ment.

IS: As a United fan, yes they were. It’s hi­lar­i­ous. Also, there are so many great YouTube videos of Arse­nal fans go­ing crazy af­ter games and they’re so en­ter­tain­ing to watch. They’d all go if Arse­nal started win­ning the league again! I think Arsene will still be manag­ing Arse­nal when he’s just a brain hooked up to a com­puter. See Andrew Ryan: Did You Get Here Al­right? at Assem­bly Ge­orge Square through­out the Ed­in­burgh Fes­ti­val Fringe from 2nd to 27th Au­gust. For tick­ets visit www.ed­fringe.com See Ian Smith: Snowflake at the Un­der­belly through­out the Ed­in­burgh Fes­ti­val Fringe from 2nd to 27th Au­gust. For tick­ets visit www.ed­fringe.com

Premier League No.1 – and not bad at rugby: Stoke’s Char­lie Adam Cheer up: Jose Mour­inho

Big prize, well, sort of: Wayne Rooney lifts the Europa League tro­phy

Hands up if you’re stay­ing: Arse­nal boss Arsene Wenger

Qual­ity cor­ners: Phil Jones

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