CHRIS HORRICKS appeals for help to create musical tributes to players of the past…
IN THE modern game, a lot is made of statistical analysis and other things that are less than entertaining, often bordering on dull and with soul-destroying repetitiveness.
With this in mind, my friend Paul and I have taken it upon ourselves to go back to the 90s of our youth and breathe new life into forgotten players or those who haven’t been held in such high esteem as the Eric Cantonas, Matt Le Tissiers and Ian Wrights of this world.
We have done this in the medium of song. Our musical tributes to these heroes have so far taken two forms: firstly finding players’ names who fit the lyrics of popular songs. For instance, Depeche Mode’s Personal
Jesus led us to replacing the line “your own personal Jesus” with the player-based lyric “(Cameron) JEROME, (Darren) PURSE, (Sean) SCANNELL, (Gabriel) JESUS” and our favourite creation so far, Ram Jam’s legendary refrain of “Whoa, Black Betty Bam-ba-Lam” in our minds became “(Ian) WOAN, (Kingsley) BLACK, (David) BATTY, (Marcus) HAHNEMANN”.
We have accompanied these ideas with videos to illustrate our vision, which consist of shirts with the names of each player in time to their mention in the lyric in question.
It may be silly and throw-away but in the modern era when things are taken too seriously, it’s high time a bit of the spirit of Frank Skinner and David Baddiel’s Fantasy Football League was reintroduced.
It is with the late Jeff Astle in mind that we progressed to the latest phase of our journey to make football fun again.
Former West Brom and England legend Astle would appear at the end of each episode of Fantasy League to close the show with a song which had some relevance to something that had been mentioned in the proceeding 30 minutes of hilarity, all the while dressed in some form of fancy dress.
We have moved on to filming ourselves singing parts of songs that have been hits but long enough ago so that they’re not contemporary and, as such, in keeping with our nostalgic quest of creativity.
For example, in the mid-2000s a band called The Feeling had a song called Never Be
Lonely which contained the lyric “people in love get fast and foolish, people in love get everything wrong” which we have lovingly crafted into “Peter Ndlovu gets fast and foolish, Peter Ndlovu gets everything wrong” (he doesn’t and we don’t intend this as any sort of slight on the character of the former Zimbabwean, Coventry and Birmingham City striker, it just sounds like they’re singing about him throughout). We have come up with dozens of these so far. However, it seems we are struggling to a degree to find material as strong as we would like. It is with this in mind that we openly invite other fans to suggest players whose names could potentially fit with the lyric of a song. If you’re reading this and you have an idea we might be able to use, please tweet it to @chrishorricks31 and if we use it you’ll be credited and notified when we come up with something…
Jerome Purse Scannell Jesus