Should You Break Up With Your BFF?
Let’s get real: some friendships aren’t made to last. But could you, or should you, break up with your best mate?
Perhaps it was when they forgot to let you know they couldn’t make it to dinner – for the fifth time – or when they were rude to one of your mates… again. Just like any relationship, friendships can have a turning point where they go sour, but how do you know when it’s time to cut and run?
It’s a question even celebs ask themselves. In fact, last week Khloé Kardashian hinted that she’d undergone a bit of a friendship overhaul. ‘We must learn who is gold, and who is simply gold plated’, she Instagrammed. ‘Be mindful of people who regularly disappoint or let you down. Stop making excuses for the ones who don’t put you first and make more time for the ones who are deserving and fighting for your time.’
We asked an expert how to tell if the writing’s on the wall…
1 They’re Always Cancelling On You
Everyone’s plans change sometimes, but if your friend is consistently cancelling on you – or worse, standing you up – it shows they don’t respect your time.
2 They’re Stressing You Out
‘Examine your threshold for conflict,’ says psychologist Dr Arthur Cassidy. ‘You might not wish to lose a valued friend, but the anguish of a toxic relationship will be damaging for you and your future friendships.’
3 It’s All Them, Them, Them
Ever get the feeling they don’t care about you? ‘Research shows us that in many cases it’s more rewarding to let go of toxic relationships,’ says Dr Cassidy, ‘especially if the people concerned unload their emotional baggage onto you. This has the potential to cause you mental ill-health.’
4 They Don’t Share Your Values
As you grow up you become more set in your values and morals. It’s good to assess whether your friends are on the same wavelength about the things that are really important to you.
5 They Don’t Make You Happy
This may sound simple, but think of it like you would a relationship. If a friend is consistently making you unhappy it may be time to reassess things. Friendship should be more about the beers, less about the tears!