‘We Were On Dif­fer­ent Paths’

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Lucy, 27, a fi­nan­cial ad­viser from Ply­mouth, tells us why she had to end it with her best mate af­ter 10 years…

‘Amy and I met when we were 15. At col­lege, we re­alised we shared an in­sane love for Friends quotes and a dis­like for our his­tory teacher who had ter­ri­ble breath – and just like that, we were best mates. She was there for me when my boyfriend cheated on me. I cov­ered for her when she’d go home with guys. We couldn’t have been tighter.

When I left for uni I was wor­ried that our friend­ship would suf­fer, but ac­tu­ally it was the op­po­site. If any­thing, we got on more. But when I met a guy I liked, things started to change. Our sin­gle days had been full of wild nights out and I think she thought my meet­ing some­one meant that had to come to an end. She wouldn’t text me for ages and then would ring me drunk at 1am to rant about her lat­est drama, but would never ask about me. I as­sumed it was a phase, but when I de­cided to go on hol­i­day with my boyfriend, she went crazy and told me it was ru­in­ing her sum­mer. I felt like a dif­fer­ent side to her had started to sur­face.

We were still friends but if we went out in a group, she wouldn’t re­ally talk to me. I asked her con­stantly if I’d done some­thing

wrong and she’d say no.

I tried not to take it per­son­ally and as­sumed it was just a weird mo­ment in our friend­ship. At the same time, I was go­ing through a pretty hard time with my par­ents, who had de­cided to di­vorce. It took a few months for me to re­alise that I hadn’t re­ally spo­ken to Amy about it. I called her a cou­ple of times and she was re­ally nice about it, but then we would ar­range din­ner to talk and more than once, she would can­cel at the last minute. See­ing her on a night out with some other mates in a Face­book photo af­ter she’d can­celled on me was the fi­nal straw.

The shift in my per­sonal cir­cum­stances meant I was see­ing every­thing in a dif­fer­ent light. I re­alised I’d been giv­ing her every­thing but when I needed sup­port, she wasn’t around. I made the de­ci­sion to meet up with her alone and tell her how I felt be­cause I didn’t want to see her any more and I didn’t want it hang­ing over us.

When we met it was a bit awk­ward, but for once I was com­pletely hon­est. She didn’t take it well and said that she felt I never both­ered with her. But it just con­firmed that we were on com­pletely dif­fer­ent paths. It did feel like a break-up and it did hurt, but I feel like we’re just bet­ter off apart. I have fond me­mories, but now I see the friends who make me feel bet­ter about my­self and it all feels a lot less toxic. Some­times you just need to end it and three months on, I have no re­grets.’

Khloé’s In­sta­gram post #re­altalk

Khloé Kar­dashian’s had a friend­ship detox

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