Digging up beautiful nature for homes is an alien concept
CONGRATULATIONS to the latest winners of our weekly competitions.
Cathy O’Connor won a £25 voucher for the Church House Inn, our mystery listener won breakfast for two at the Rainbow Café in Macclesfield, and Sue Armitt won a £10 voucher to spend at the Mandarin House in Macclesfield.
Each week we have on air and website competitions where you can win meal vouchers for our restaurant of the week, which could be the High Street Chippy in Macclesfield, the Legh Arms in Adlington, the Church House Inn, the Cock and Pheasant, the Briscola Restaurant or Bay Leaf Indian Cuisine in Bollington, the Bulls Head in Kerridge, the Windmill Inn in Whiteley Green, and the Fina Bar and Grill in Macclesfield.
We also have a weekly takeaway treat competition where you can win vouchers to the Mandarin House or Macc Flames in Macclesfield.
New competitions go on our website each week. Thank you to all the restaurants and other businesses that support us, especially our main sponsors, Incom Telecommunications, Chrome Motors, Cheshire Demolition, Holmes Naden estate agents and Joe Henshaw. Their details are on our website. AUGUST is a weird month isn’t it? Cheshire’s like an evacuation zone after an alien invasion.
The roads are deserted. I actually drove to Flash today without seeing another vehicle (there’s usually a tractor or two).
Eleven months of the year Cheshire’s roads are jammed with traffic, August arrives and there’s no one around.
Where is everyone have they been abducted?
They can’t all be in Abersoch.
Note the way utility companies exploit the opportunity to dig holes all over town and leave them as a surprise for families returning home.
It’s a prank they play every year. We have an excavation on our road complete with traffic lights and contraflow system but no work of any kind in progress. It’s just a hole.
If any bad news breaks politicians like to save it for August, preferably just as the exodus begins so that they can avoid the fall out.
It’s a great month to finalise a ‘public consultation’... with a conclusion no one wants.
What would invading aliens make of us?
“Look, ET, they are digging up their beautiful green fields for earthling shelters and leaving ugly brown landscapes untouched.”
“And why do they do this, Mission Leader?” “Democracy.” “What is this democracy?”
“It is when earthlings decide what they don’t want ...and get it.”
“So they don’t want to dig up their green fields?” “No, they do not.” “So that’s what they get?”
“Yes, Child of the Universe, that is what they get.”
“I don’t think I like democracy.”
“But you must if you are to live on Earth.”
“Please may I borrow your intergalactic communicator?” “For what purpose?” “Phone home...”
●● Aliens would find Cheshire’s policy of digging up green fields very confusing, says Vic