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House, 5 Union Street, Ard­wick, Manch­ester,

M12 4JD I’M in a bit of a quandary be­cause I’m get­ting turned on by the idea of hav­ing sex with the van driver who de­liv­ers our online shop­ping.

Ev­ery week I see him and I get drip­ping wet. It’s weird be­cause he’s big, fat and ugly.

I just don’t know why I want him so much, but when­ever I see him I imag­ine him loom­ing over me, all flabby and ugly, and I just feel an over­pow­er­ing urge to have him in­side me.

He’s all I think about when I mas­tur­bate, and I’m do­ing that a lot. What is wrong with me?

Jill, Portsmouth Nickie Ann says: You can’t help who you fancy. Tell him next time he calls. You never know, he might just de­liver in

bed! Dear Nickie Ann,

MY mis­sus has got a bit fat lately — and I love it! Her boobs are mas­sive and her bum is huge too, I can’t get enough.

I love the feel of be­ing able to get a good hand­ful of her flesh as we’re go­ing at it.

But now she wants to go to a club and lose loads of weight. How can I per­suade her to stay chubby?

Jim, Bas­ingstoke

Nickie Ann says:

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