MILF TALK

They’re older, they’re bolder, they know just what they want…sex!

Midweek Sport - - NEWS -

THERE’S noth­ing sex­ier than a woman who’s been around the block a few times and knows just how to get your en­gine revving. And these golden oldies have seen more than their fair share of gear­sticks! Read on to dis­cover the saucy se­crets of the dirty over-30s...

FIRST TIME

RACHEL: Can you re­mem­ber that far back?

JULES: I was 16 and it was with my boyfriend. The sex was good ac­tu­ally, es­pe­cially as we didn’t know what we were do­ing.

RACHEL: Were you quite dar­ing then? Did you shag out­side?

JULES: No, we were far too ner­vous for any­thing like that. We had sex at his house on his bed. It was nice though. It was bet­ter than I thought it was go­ing to be – and it didn’t hurt. The fact he was quite ex­pe­ri­enced re­ally helped.

RACHEL: I was 16 as well. It was with my first proper boyfriend and I’d say it was pretty av­er­age. We were both ner­vous as nei­ther of us had done any­thing be­fore.

LESBO LOV­ING

JULES: Have you snogged many of your mates?

RACHEL: Yeah, when I’ve been on nights out. It’s just

a bit of a drunken laugh isn’t it?

JULES: Have you ever thought of tak­ing it fur­ther?

RACHEL: I’d never do that, girls don’t turn me on. Only blokes do it for me.

JULES: I’ve never even snogged any of my mates. I just can’t imag­ine kiss­ing an­other girl. Girls snog each other just to get at­ten­tion from blokes. It’s not my thing. I’d give you a smooch un­der the misel toe this year though!

RACHEL: I’ll gladly oblige, my dear.

TRADES­MAN’S

JULES: What about bum fun? Have you tried it?

RACHEL: Nope, and I never will ei­ther. The thought of it turns my stom­ach.

JULES: I haven’t ei­ther, it’s sick isn’t it? If my boyfriend wanted to stick his pole up there I’d think he was gay and would tell him to start go­ing out with other men.

RACHEL: Yes I agree. I think

Strip club bouncer caught us at it in the toi­let cu­bi­cle

it’s a bit of a gay thing to do as well.

JULES: To­tally gay.

DRESS­ING UP

RACHEL: Do you like dress­ing up in the boudoir?

JULES: I’ve only ever dressed up once and that was when I bought a sexy nurse’s uni­form. It was ex­cit­ing.

RACHEL: I’ve never dressed up in a cos­tume. I love wear­ing sexy lin­gerie though, es­pe­cially lace stuff.

JULES: Do you rate dress­ing up then? RACHEL: Yeah, it shows a bloke that you’re pre­pared to make the ef­fort and are up for a spot of sauci­ness in the bed­room. A guy doesn’t want a girl who will let things get stale. It keeps it in­ter­est­ing.

JULES: What cos­tume are you hop­ing to get next?

RACHEL: I’ve seen a sexy Santa out­fit in Ann Sum­mers that I want to buy. Then my boyfriend can un­wrap his Christ­mas present him­self.

JULES: I’m hop­ing to buy a French maid’s out­fit soon.

SIZE MAT­TERS?

JULES: Have you ever had a huge willy?

RACHEL: The big­gest I’ve had is my cur­rent boyfriend – and that’s one of the main rea­sons I’m still with him. JULES: Wow. How big is it?

RACHEL: It’s about eight inches – and he knows how to use it. Have you had a big­ger one?

JULES: The big­gest was when I went on hol­i­day to Malia and I met a bloke out there at a party. He was lo­cal, not English, and he had a mas­sive willy. It must have been at least nine inches.

RACHEL: Was he any good with it though?

JULES: Yes, he was fan­tas­tic. Size does mat­ter but only if they know what to do with it. Some blokes just lie there and think the willy will do all the work.

TASTY NOSH

JULES: I spit, but some­times I swal­low if I don’t want to make a mess. Giv­ing a gob­ble is such a chore, I’d rather watch Count­down! It’s bor­ing but it’s some­thing that has to be done. Get­ting jizz in your mouth is never pleas­ant.

RACHEL: I usu­ally swal­low but it tastes dis­gust­ing. Most of the time it goes so far to the back of my throat that I gag. Yuck!

OH NO MO­MENTS

JULES: Have you ever been caught in the act?

RACHEL: I got kicked out of a strip club in Lon­don for hav­ing sex in the toi­let with my boyfriend. I was sat on top of him on the toi­let and the bouncer kicked the door open and saw my boobs. I’ve never been so em­bar­rassed. My jeans were round my an­kles too. It was aw­ful.

JULES: I got caught by my sis­ter! We were on hol­i­day in France and my boyfriend at the time came. We were on a camp­ing site and had a wan­der off where we couldn’t be seen — or so I thought. The next thing my sis­ter rides up to us on her bike!

RACHEL: That re­minds me, I also got caught by a bunch of boy scouts when I was hav­ing sex in the woods. You should have heard all the gig­gling! We had two dogs with us too so we couldn’t get away as quick as we’d hoped. I got tree burns up my back.

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