How soon be­fore Rovers is sex filled drug den?

Midweek Sport - - FRONT PAGE -

A TER­RI­BLE crime took place on Mon­day’s Coro­na­tion Street.

Not the mur­der of Frank Foster. Be­sides, we all KNOW it was Peter Bar­low be­cause Frank raped his mis­sus and stole her busi­ness, and Peter was drunk­enly threat­en­ing to do him in.

It is an open and shut case – un­less, of course, the writ­ers were de­lib­er­ately mis­lead­ing us in or­der to in­crease the sur­prise when the real cul­prit turns out to be some­one else en­tirely, prob­a­bly the per­son we least sus­pect. But that would never hap­pen in a soap, would it?

Any­way, the real crime was Karl’s decision to in­stall a mas­sive, blar­ing telly in the Rovers.

“An­nie Walker will be spin­ning in her grave,” said Rita. Many pub tra­di­tion­al­ists will agree.

“I never thought I would see the day this place would turn into a clone of ev­ery pub in Manch­ester,” she added.

Ac­tu­ally, that may not be so bad. The only other pub in Manch­ester I know is The Jockey, from Shame­less.

It might liven things up to see Nor­ris sort­ing coke while rat­tling Emily Bishop in the bogs, and Ken Bar­low or­der­ing “a pint and an E please, luv”.

As for Betty’s hot pot, they won’t know whether to eat it or smoke it.

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