Crouchy’s bar dwarf nightmare
LANKY footballer Peter Crouch has admitted he has terrifying nightmares where he’s a DWARF!
The Stoke striker stands tall at a whopping 6ft 8in.
But beanpole Crouchy, 31, says he is plagued by bizarre dreams where he’s a short-arse midget.
The England forward revealed: “About three years ago I started having this dream about being a dwarf.
“I was walking around a bar and I couldn’t see anything.
“And nobody could see me! It was completely surreal.
“It started when a lot was being made of my height at the time.
“I guess something in my brain just clicked and went the other way in the dream.
“It was a totally different perspective, I can tell you.
“I’d wake up relieved to be tall, and thankful for what God gave me.” I LOVE horse racing and I think the Cheltenham Festival is the most exciting sports week of the year!
By the time you read this I should be at the course because it’s Ladies Day and I’ll be there in my poshest frock. I might have a glass or two of champagne but I won’t be having too much because I’m there to watch the racing, not mess about.
The big race of the day is the Queen Mother Chase and I think my money will be on Kauto Star, Ruby Walsh is riding him and he’s always been a lucky jockey for me.
If you’re watching it on the telly keep an eye out for me, you might see me cheering in the crowd!
Q: WHAT is the difference between a fox
and a dog? A: Four pints