Fat’s the way to do it, fella!
CHARITY show Let’s Dance for Sport Relief is famous for men wearing frocks.
Who could forget Robert Webb as the chick from Flashdance, Rufus Hound as Cheryl Cole, or Russell Kane as Beyonce?
All classic moments – but none came close to Saturday’s heat, which saw a chap grooving in a flowing scarlet dress to the Bee Gee’s hit You Should Be Dancing.
For extra chuckles, he had not even bothered to shave his five o’clock shadow!
I must admit I’d not really heard of him before but apparently he was a decent javelin thrower back in the day.
Either way, he deserves our respect and admiration for being such a good sport.
Fatima Whitbread, I salute you, sir!
Other highlights of the show were Roland Rivron’s routine to Fatboy Slim’s Weapon of Choice (get your money on it to win this Saturday), judge Lee Nelson slipping w*nking gags onto BBC1 prime time, and comediennes Watson and Oliver failing to raise a smirk doing Torvill and Dean’s famous Bolero ice dance routine.
It felt like they had transported themselves to Sarajevo in 1984. If only it could have been Sarajevo in 1994. Preferably during a particularly heavy shelling. THERE was a rum bunch on Friday’s
which was set in Stockport. Alistair was a mincing bank clerk who reckoned he did not fit the gay stereotype. He said that shortly before trying to “jazz up” a Swiss Roll by spraying it gold. It looked like one of Liberace’s turds.
Then there was Samuel, who was originally from Maryland, USA, “where we pride ourselves on providing the best crabs in the world”.
He obviously hasn’t met any Wythenshawe yet.
Gillian hated the idea of being famous. You have nothing to worry about, luv – unless we bring back circus freak shows.
And spunky hairdresser Amy was officially a Lady. Sounds impressive – but in Stockport that just means she’ll wait for the bus stop to empty before having a p*ss. TOP Gear rounded off the series by taking the p*ss out of golf bores.
They did so only AFTER borrowing a £5.6m Ferrari from Chris Evans, the Radio 2 DJ, car enthusiast and renowned golf bore.
Chris keeps his Ferrari collection in a pristine garage, where the vintage motors are treated to classical tunes from an automatic piano.
I wonder what music he would play to a bunch of clapped out old bangers. Radio 2, perhaps?
Speaking of music, the final celebrity guest was guitar legend Slash, from Guns n Roses.
He drove his lap like a sedated pensioner, barely troubling its suspension at all. Perhaps he did not want anyone to say: “Look! The axle rose!” Sorry. “I HAVE got two people in my red area and three more waiting to join me!”
Sounds like a standard Saturday night for Dale Winton on shoddy new BBC1 game show