Thanks for the mam­maries

Midweek Sport - - THURSDAY MARCH 15 -

ON Satur­day night I filmed an RNB video for a young and up-and-com­ing new artist.

Hon­estly, I think I must be get­ting old. It was re­ally hard work learn­ing a dance rou­tine and bump­ing and grind­ing away for hours on end!

I was danc­ing with these two gor­geous young hunks who were about 10 years younger than me.

They were so fit I was wet through and not just from sweat! I WAS so up­set when I heard on the news that six sol­diers had been killed in Afghanistan.

When I saw their poor par­ents on the tele­vi­sion I burst into tears. I am a mum and I just can’t imag­ine what they are go­ing through.

I was in the gym and I just started cry­ing – ev­ery­one must have won­dered what on earth the mat­ter was but it just re­ally got to me. I was re­ally over­whelmed by it all. The youngest one was only 19 – just a baby. I was so im­pressed with how lovely the par­ents came across when they were pay­ing trib­ute to them.

If that was me I’d have been a hys­ter­i­cal wreck. The sad thing is that I think the rea­son they seemed so to­gether was be­cause they had pre­pared them­selves for that hap­pen­ing.

My heart re­ally goes out to them and I think it’s im­por­tant for ev­ery­one to ap­pre­ci­ate what they are do­ing for their coun­try. THIS picture of Jor­dan landed on my desk this week and all I could say was Oh. My. God.

She looks like a drag queen.

What the f*** has hap­pened to her?

It’s about time she hung up her mod­el­ling shoes – we can’t all look good into our 30s.

I heard she was train­ing with my for­mer per­sonal trainer Rhino from Gla­di­a­tors but he hasn’t done a very good job with her.

And I’ve got an­other mes­sage for her – change your make-up artist love, they are mak­ing you look like a man. THE story about six-yearold autis­tic boy Scott Lee who claims he had his hands tied be­hind his back by his teacher sick­ened me.

My lit­tle boy Luca is also six and autis­tic too and I think that if it’s true, it’s dis­gust­ing.

Autism suf­fer­ers have lit­tle quirks and can­not bear to be re­strained. If my lit­tle boy had his hands tied like that it would be like the worst form of tor­ture.

I just hope that poor lit­tle boy is OK now.


It makes me re­ally an­gry that there are lovely, brave young lads who are pre­pared to go and fight and de­fend their coun­try – and then there are those scum­bags who just sit around tak­ing drugs and fight­ing each other and ri­ot­ing.

All they care about is what is hap­pen­ing on their own doorsteps while these other brave lads are out de­fend­ing their coun­try.

I think they should send some of those louts over to Afghanistan to give them a taste of what it’s like.

Send the ig­no­rant lit­tle f***ers to the front line and see how brave they are. I reckon they’d be far too spine­less to be sol­diers. AT the end of the month I am tak­ing part in a mem­o­ra­bilia show at the NEC in Birm­ing­ham.

I’ll be sell­ing copies of my top DVD Mcken­zie Magic which fea­tures me and other girls, in­clud­ing the gor­geous Gemma Massey, hav­ing lesbo romps – there is even an eight- girl orgy.

It is a non-stop sex fest fea­tur­ing me as a ma­gi­cian – it’s amaz­ing what I can con­jure up!

I will also be sign­ing posters and pos­ing for pics so if any­one wants to come down and see me make sure you book a ticket asap.

If you want to bring me a copy of your favourite Sport news­pa­per I will sign those too! EV­ERY­ONE is talk­ing about Lot­tery win­ner Matt Topham who won £45 mil­lion and yet hasn’t given a penny to his mum.

I think that’s fair enough to be hon­est be­cause they haven’t spo­ken for seven years.

I don’t un­der­stand why she has let it hap­pen – if that was me and my son wouldn’t talk to me I would be there in his face ev­ery sin­gle day telling him I was sorry and that I loved him.

What­ever she did it must have been pretty bad for him to have dis­owned her so if he doesn’t want to give her any money from his win­nings then that’s up to him. EAR­LIER on to­day I de­cided to go for a lit­tle run around my new neigh­bour­hood in Sur­rey.

I only moved house re­cently and I haven’t been jog­ging here be­fore.

But I tell you that is the first and last time I go run­ning here.

I was wear­ing my usual train­ing gear and I thought my sports bra was strong enough to keep my boobs in place.

But as soon as I set off the car horns started beep­ing and I could see fel­las slow­ing down to get a bet­ter look at me.

Some of them were driv­ing round and round a round­about so they could see me again and again.

It was dan­ger­ous – I thought there was go­ing to be a pile-up! I NOW have 22,000 fol­low­ers on Twit­ter which is fab­u­lous but I would love to get even more.

Some of you lot may have no­ticed I have been post­ing a lot of late-night tweets be­cause I am suf­fer­ing from in­som­nia.

So if there are any other in­som­ni­acs out there I’ll be on the look-out for some latenight mes­sages.

It’s the ul­ti­mate col­lec­tor’s ex­hi­bi­tion and there will be all sorts of stuff there from sports mem­o­ra­bilia to TV and film stars there sign­ing au­to­graphs.

The event is on Satur­day March 31 and Sun­day April 1 and is open 9am-5pm. Tick­ets start at just £10.

For more in­for­ma­tion and to book tick­ets for the show visit www.mem­o­ra­ birm­ing­ham or Twit­ter @mcm­expo.

GOR­GEOUS: Get a load of me and Gemma on DVD at the


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