Matt’s mother of a telly show
BBC talent show saw a turn by Bo Bruce, aka Lady Catherine Anna Brudenell-bruce, daughter of the Earl of Cardigan.
She fears being judged for her posh upbringing but I have no problem with the fact she was born with a silver spoon in her mouth. I just wish she’d take it out before singing.
The crowd loved her, even giving a standing ovation – although that might have just been natural deference to their social superior.
We also saw Tyler James, “best friend” of the late Amy Winehouse, singing the Otis Redding hit BBC2’S Great British Menu kicked off its search for a perfect meal by asking Scottish chefs to prepare a starter.
That seems unwise. Who’ll have room for a main after all that deep fried heroin? MATT Lucas recorded a special message on the preview tape of his new BBC1 show,
In it he invited telly reviewers to “say what you like about the show but please be nice about my mum”. OK, here goes. Matt, your show is bloody awful and I resent you for making me waste 30 minutes of my life watching it.
For a start, it is just a rip-off of Room 101: three jobbing comedians riff on a selection of shared themes then the host picks the winner.
How original! And what a great opportunity to put Jason Manford on the telly. It must have been at least four hours since his last appearance on a cheap panel show.
Then there are the lame topics, like “Which is the smuggest nation of people?”
You can probably imagine how sniffy the lofty-minded BBC would get if a tabloid newspaper asked that question, but I guess it must be OK to demand that we “Nuke the Chinese!” when it is part of a middleclass parlour game? Just like it is OK to suggest all German women have hair armpits.
By the way, getting your guests to draw and sing just looked desperate – like you knew the format stank so you tried to bolster it with flimsy gimmicks.
As for building a set to look like your home, Noel Edmonds beat you to it 20 years ago.
Other than all of that, Matt, this rancid turd of a show was absolutely brilliant – and your mum, who you randomly incorporate into the show (just like Sarah Millican does with her dad on another slapdash BBC mess) seems lovely.
Although it is her fault you were born in the first place.
How’s that for you, motherbooker? ANOTHER cheerful week on as Shirley planned best mate Heather’s funeral on the back of an envelope.
There was not much room to write because it was the same one
bosses use to plan all their storylines and new characters.
She wanted a 1980sthemed funeral, with mourners wearing mullet wigs and Frankie Says t-shirts. The BBC, meanwhile, just want 1980s-themed viewing figures.
Choosing the funeral music was the easiest part. It had to be George Michael, obviously, because Heather was a massive fan – and the last thing she heard was a “Wham!”
Considering she was bludgeoned to death with a photo frame, they could have gone for a Boyzone classic. Altogether now: “Cos I’ve got a picture of you in my mind....”
Or, as Amy might have put it: