TOWIE SHOWS ITS TRUE CLASS

Midweek Sport - - NEWS -

SUN­DAY marked the 100th an­niver­sary of the sink­ing of the Ti­tanic – a tragedy which cost 1,517 lives.

For­tu­nately, ITV2’S The Only Way Is Es­sex was able to pay trib­ute in a re­spect­ful and fit­ting man­ner – by get­ting fat Gemma to whip her norks out.

She and boyfriend Char­lie wanted to recre­ate the fa­mous Ti­tanic movie scene when Jack (Leonardo Dicaprio) sketched Rose (Kate Winslet).

Un­for­tu­nately she looked more like the real star of that movie – the replica ship. The only dif­fer­ence is that Gemma would never come into con­tact with an ice­berg. Or any other type of let­tuce.

She is wor­ried that Char­lie has still not taken her to bed af­ter six weeks of dat­ing.

Maybe he is just wait­ing for the right mo­ment. Or the builders to fin­ish re­in­forc­ing his be­d­room floor.

Speak­ing of pork­ers, tubby Arg has shed two stone as he pre­pares to take on the marathon.

He looks like he had al­ready fin­ished sev­eral, although they are called Snick­ers these days.

He un­veiled his new look on stage, while singing the Nina Si­mone clas­sic Feel­ing Good.

It was a big en­trance, although prob­a­bly not as big as Gemma’s.

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