WHAT THE BOOK? When pub­lish­ers lose the plot

Midweek Sport - - NEWS - By JUSTIN DUNN

THINGS have changed a lot in pub­lish­ing since the in­no­cent days of Enid Blyton.

Gone are the days of beds made of heather, gen­er­ous slabs of choco­late cake and lash­ings of gin­ger beer.

Now the world’s great pub­lish­ing houses will print just about any­thing if they think they can get a quid or two out of it.

All of these ti­tles are avail­able to buy right now on book web­sites such as Ama­zon.

Ti­tles like The Haunted Vagina by Amer­i­can writer Carl­ton Mel­lick III, whose first chap­ter be­gins with the im­mor­tal line: “I’ve been scared to have sex with Stacey ever since she told me her vagina was haunted.”

Or Dick: A User Guide, where “Doc­tors Michele and Caro­line Costa thor­oughly de­scribe the anatomy, func­tions, proper hy­giene, safety, and ef­fec­tive han­dling of the most friendly male ap­pendage.”

Sounds like a load of cock and bull to us! Moore


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