ENGLAND v SCOTLAND GAGBAG!
FIVE JOKES FOR SCOTLAND FANS… A BOASTFUL Englishman said to a Scot: “Take away your friendliness, your mountains, glens and lochs and what have you got?” “England,” replied the Scot. plane full of English people? A: When they turn off the engine you can still hear the whining! Q: WHY ar en’t the England football team allowed to own a dog? A: Because they can’t hold on to a lead. IN a statement from TV bosses, all future England games will now be shown on the gay porn channel.
It is thought that 11 arseholes being regularly shafted is just too explicit for regular TV. FIVE JOKES FOR ENGLAND FANS… Q: WHAT do you call a Scot in the World Cup? A: The referee. Q: How do you tell what clan a Scotsman belongs to? A: Grab under his kilt and if it’s a quar pounder, he’s a McDonald! GORDON Strachan noticed an old lady struggling with her shopping.
He asked her: “Can you manage, dear?” A PREGNANT Scottish girl phones her dad at midnight and asks: “Can you come and get me? I think ma water has broken.” Her dad says: “Where are you ringing from?” She says: “From my knickers tae ma feet!” SHOPKEEPER to a Scottish fan, buying a pocket knife: “It has four blades and a corkscrew.”
The Scot asked: “Y ou haven’t one with four corkscrews and a blade, have you?”