Open your door to 20k no­bod­ies – it’s the law

Midweek Sport - - NEWS -

WHO’s al­lowed to en­ter your home with­out ask­ing first?

In our house, that would be the mis­sus, the kids and me and – with prior no­tice – the land­lord.

If a crime was to have been com­mit­ted or sus­pected, or some­one was feared in­jured or in dan­ger, we can add the cops and paramedics along with fire­fight­ers to that list, but that’s it, right? Wrong. It turns out there are nearly 20,000 ut­ter no­bod­ies em­ployed around the coun­try at our ex­pense with “pow­ers of en­try” to our homes.

And they can choose from an eye-wa­ter­ing 912 dif­fer­ent rea­sons to in­vade our pri­vacy.

The­o­ret­i­cally, these no-marks can march into your home un­in­vited if they sus­pect you have in­fected plant pots.

Equally, don’t al­low your­self to fall into an ac­ci­den­tal trance while watch­ing Songs of Praise as they might think you’re be­ing hyp­no­tised – and they can barge in if they sus­pect that, too.

At the last count there were 19,375 “of­fi­cials” up and down Bri­tain with the power of en­try to your home. That’s an av­er­age of 45 snoop­ers per lo­cal coun­cil – where, as sure as night fol­lows day, these A MU­SI­CAL about the dy­ing days of the north east ship build­ing in­dus­try is be­ing pulled from the stage af­ter just three months.

Ex-Po­lice front­man Sting ( penned the thing, and then for rea­sons un­known to the rest of us de­cided it should be per­formed in that well known hot­bed of for­mer Ge­ordie ship­builders in, er, New York. Be­cause Broad­way and Wallsend have so much in com­mon, of course. peo­ple are mostly em­ployed. That’s right, the or­gan­i­sa­tions in­creas­ingly in­ca­pable of keep­ing our li­braries open, ar­rang­ing meals on wheels for the el­derly or sup­port­ing spe­cial schools for des­per­ately ill kids – some of the main rea­sons coun­cils ex­ist in the Back to fid­dling with your lute on a field of bar­ley, fella SCOT­TISH Power cus­tomer? first place – are none­the­less handed the power to med­dle in your place of refuge. How re­as­sur­ing, eh? Us mere tax­pay­ers are ex­pected to keep tug­ging on our fore­locks when­ever the self-styled “rulers” of a lo­cal corpy – who are in fact sup­posed to be “ser­vants” – feel like in­ter­fer­ing in things of which they should have NO con­cern.

No mat­ter that it’s your coun­cil tax that goes up ev­ery year while ser­vices are cut, there’s al­ways money to splash out on the town hall Thought Po­lice.

Bri­tain needs far fewer prod­noses, not more.

But Town Hall tur­keys will NEVER vote for Christ­mas.

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