PRINCESS KATE’S ‘ROMP WITH RANDY CAROL SINGER’

Midweek Sport - - NEWS - By JESS GALLEY jess@sun­daysport.co.uk

CHEEKY comic VIZ was at the cen­tre of a Royal storm last night for a Christ­mas is­sue show­ing the Duchess of Cam­bridge shag­ging a randy carol singer!

Princess Kate romps with Melvin Gavis­con while Prince Wil­liam has nipped down the pub with the rest of the Roy­als.

In the spoof tabloid-style ar­ti­cle ,called Wa-Hey In A Manger, shag­ger Melvin “lifts the lid on his two decades of fes­tive nookie.”

The 63-year-old claims he has romped with some of Hol­ly­wood’s big­gest celebs in­clud­ing Madonna, Pamela An­der­son, Keira Knight­ley and even Amer­ica’s new First Lady Me­la­nia Trump.

But his big­gest con­quest ap­par­ently came when he knocked on the door of Buck­ing­ham Palace and Princess Kate an­swered the door.

Kate – wear­ing a “see-through nightie” – de­cides to re­pay him for his ren­di­tion of We Wish You A Merry Christ­mas with a sex romp.

Melvin re­vealed: “Next thing I knew, the see-through nightie had hit the deck – along with top-of-the-range Vic­to­ria’s Se­cret scuds – and the fu­ture queen of Eng­land was stand­ing stark bol­lock naked be­fore me.

“Mod­esty. not to men­tion the Trea­sons Act 1534, for­bids me from go­ing into too much de­tail about what hap­pened next, but suf­fice it to say we painted that sofa fifty shades of royal blue. “And then, once we’d got our breaths back, we did it again. The knowl­edge that if we were dis­cov­ered I’d be pub­licly hung, drawn and quar­tered only height­ened the erotic ex­cite­ment of our tryst.

“As I was pulling up my trackie bot­toms af­ter­wards, I sud­denly heard a key in the front door. Let me tell you, I was out the win­dow and high-tail­ing it across the Buck­ing­ham Palace lawn like my arse was on fire!”

The fake re­port has been lashed by one re­li­gious cam­paign group.

Chris­tian Coali­tion spokesman Lee Dou­glas said: “It’s in very bad taste. I don’t think it’s funny at all.”

POOR TASTE: Tale of Kate romp

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from UK

© PressReader. All rights reserved.