Sex-mad wife makes me feel starv­ing all the time

WITH

Midweek Sport - - THE WORLD FAMOUS AGONY PAGE -

Dear Ash­leigh, THIS may sound strange but my wife loves to cook in the nude. She’s 44, but thinks she’s 18 – and to be fair she’s got a good fig­ure. The trou­ble is I’ve not had a de­cent meal in months. Take the other morn­ing… I was read­ing the pa­per while she pre­pared me a full English. As much as I tried to con­cen­trate on the news, I couldn’t help but get aroused at the sight of my wife bend­ing over to put the ba­con and sausages un­der the grill. It wasn’t long be­fore her breasts were cov­ered in cook­ing oil and I was hav­ing a good old rub-a-dub.

Gob­ble

And when the sausages were done I was so ex­cited I used them on her in­stead of putting them in my gob. As usual, I turned up at work starv­ing hun­gry and look­ing very di­shev­elled. The same thing hap­pened when I got home. There she was to­tally nude but for a light dust­ing of flour from the fish she was bat­ter­ing. She poured me a drink and be­fore I knew it my cock was stood to at­ten­tion and she was hav­ing a gob­ble. Be­fore I had a chance to tuck into my fish sup­per she’d rubbed it all over her­self and de­manded I eat it off her.

Of course, most of it ended up on the kitchen floor.

So in des­per­a­tion I sug­gested we go out for a nice meal – that way she wouldn’t be able to dis­tract me around the house be­cause she’d have to put some ruddy clothes on at least.

But when she was fi­nally ready and she came down­stairs, she was wear­ing a mi­cro-mini with sussies show­ing and a re­ally low-cut top.

It was enough to give me a right old twitch in the groin area, I can tell you!

And as we drove to the restau­rant she leaned over and started to nosh on my semi-aroused cock.

Nor­mally I would have told her to stop be­ing so silly – I could have crashed the bloody car!

But I found a quiet spot to park up so quickly ripped my kecks off and let her have a good old suck while mas­sag­ing my plums un­til I shot my load right down her throat.

When we even­tu­ally got to the restau­rant, sat down and or­dered our food, she told me she wasn’t wear­ing knick­ers and needed an­other see­ing-to right there and then in the bogs.

So I threw one up her as quickly as pos­si­ble but when we got back to our ta­ble from shagging, our food had gone stone cold.

This sort of thing hap­pens all the time and I’m ab­so­lutely des­per­ate for a good square meal and don’t know what to do.

Any sug­ges­tions? KR, West Yorks Ash­leigh says… POP your pinny on and cook your­self some­thing, you use­less fool!

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