Damian Smith 1996 Thun­der­cat

Look­ing a gift horse in the mouth

Practical Sportsbikes (UK) - - In Our Shed -

ONCE, WHEN I was treated like a hu­man be­ing on an­other magazine, I had a beau­ti­ful brand-new Yamaha Thun­der­ace. Un­til it got nicked. Now I’m the proud bor­rower of this Thun­der­cat. But I’m not go­ing to al­low my­self to be­lieve I’ve been in any way down­graded. Even though it’s got three mil­lion miles on it – and even at that I’m sure it’s been clocked.

It’s all there, just needs a tidy up, a lick of paint here and there (ie just about ev­ery­where) and it’s good to go. Well, that’s what they keep telling me so it must be cor­rect. De­spite hav­ing a true 60,000 miles on it, the en­gine sounds sweet, it car­bu­rates nicely and the deal is chain and sprock­ets for cer­tain and a thor­ough safety check and ma­jor ser­vice too. Be­cause my so-called friends at Prac­ti­cal Sports­bikes will help me do it, I’m very much look­ing for­ward to get­ting my hands dirty (they told me to say), al­though I’m hop­ing to avoid that by ‘art di­rect­ing’ the story, be­cause my job is, af­ter all, art ed­i­tor.

This means I’ll wan­der around point­ing to things us­ing phrases like, “Give me more Alan” and, “Yes Jim, I’m feel­ing it” or maybe, “That’s not what I need Mark. Not at all.”

Then, when they’ve done the con­sid­er­able hard graft needed to give me free trans­port, I’ll treat them with ut­ter and de­served con­tempt, like I usu­ally do. What I’m re­ally af­ter is a plas­tic duck bon­net mas­cot for my BMW es­tate car.

I like mo­tor­bikes but I’m not ac­tu­ally pre­pared to put any ef­fort into fix­ing one, so it’s lucky that they are. Thanks read­ers, I knew you un­der­stand.

A look of in­no­cent de­light – for now

Light re­me­dial work re­quired

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from UK

© PressReader. All rights reserved.