THREE IN A BED: ‘It’s a pretty fun sex life’

This trio are tear­ing up the tra­di­tional re­la­tion­ship rule book, and hav­ing the time of their lives…

Reveal - - Reveal Real Lives - Han­nah Stevens, Laura Hin­ton

Tak­ing ‘three’s com­pany’ to a more in­ti­mate level, Cait Earnest, 28, from New York, shares a one-bed apart­ment with her two boyfriends and their two adorable pups.

Her part­ners, Chris and Matt Brandt – who tied the knot in Septem­ber 2015 – have been to­gether for eight years.

They were ex­plor­ing an open re­la­tion­ship when Cait, an ex­ec­u­tive as­sis­tant, met Chris, 38, on Tin­der in 2014.

‘I’d never been with two peo­ple at the same time be­fore,’ she says. ‘It’s dif­fer­ent strokes for dif­fer­ent folks, but I would say it’s a pretty fun sex life.’

Chris and

Matt, 28, were ac­tu­ally al­ready en­gaged when they met Cait, af­ter Chris pro­posed in Paris.

‘We were on the “love-lock bridge” – he had a lock, and on the back of it, it said, “Will you marry me?”’ re­veals Matt. ‘The lock fit­ted the key. It was emo­tional.’ Later, when Chris sug­gested the idea of bring­ing some­one else into their re­la­tion­ship, Matt re­alised it might be for him.

‘Matt had never had any ex­pe­ri­ence with women be­fore we met,’ says Chris. ‘But I’d dated quite a few girls as well. One day, I said to Matt, “How would you feel about in­volv­ing a woman in our re­la­tion­ship in some fash­ion?” Af­ter talk­ing about it for a while, he warmed up to it.’ ‘I al­ways knew where I stood with Chris,’ adds Matt. ‘There was no one who could come into our re­la­tion­ship and come be­tween me and him. I couldn’t be in­se­cure about it, be­cause I knew where I stood.’

Af­ter Cait and Chris met for drinks one night, they got on so well that they de­cided to head home to meet Matt, who’d been at work.

‘We weren’t planning for any­thing to hap­pen straight away, but Cait was so ex­cited to meet me,’ says Matt. ‘I had to open a beer to crack the nerves be­fore she ar­rived, though. I was so ner­vous! Thank­fully, we bonded over Tay­lor Swift – we just played some mu­sic and hit it off. This was all new to her. It was one of her ad­mirable traits, that she was able to open her mind to me, and I was able to open up to her.’

While Chris and Cait are both bi­sex­ual, Matt iden­ti­fies as ho­moflex­i­ble. He says, ‘I like

guys and I’m open – flex­i­ble – to women, al­though I pre­fer men. I guess that I had an awak­en­ing af­ter I had a sex­ual ex­pe­ri­ence with a woman. It’s just an­other body, an­other soul, an­other con­nec­tion that I can have.’

Af­ter that first night, the trio de­cided to see each other again, and it wasn’t long be­fore they were all smitten.

‘When we first got to­gether, I strug­gled with jeal­ousy a bit,’ ad­mits Cait. ‘I had a very strong con­nec­tion with Chris and, some­times, felt frus­trated that I’d have to split time with Matt. But a lot of that came from my own in­se­cu­rity, be­cause I didn’t know where my place was in the re­la­tion­ship.’

But the trio stuck with it, and things only got bet­ter.

‘Af­ter a cou­ple of months, Cait was stay­ing over five nights a week, so that was when she de­cided she might as well just move in,’ says Chris.

‘We all just got along re­ally well,’ adds Matt. ‘We all like to have a good time, and we have sim­i­lar in­ter­ests – all three of us go to mu­sic fes­ti­vals, we all love travel, and Chris has got us both into sports.’

De­spite the un­usual na­ture of their re­la­tion­ship, the trio have al­ways been very open with their friends and fam­ily.

‘My par­ents knew me and Chris were in an open re­la­tion­ship,’ says Matt. ‘And Chris’s par­ents are the same. They were just happy for us.’

Cait says, ‘When we meet some­body at a bar, I’ll usu­ally say, “Hi, I’m Cait and these are my two boyfriends.” Peo­ple of­ten ask if I’m jok­ing.’

In Septem­ber 2015, Matt and Chris de­cided to tie the knot on a beach in the Caribbean – with Cait by their side.

‘Cait wrote our vows for us, and of­fi­ci­ated the wed­ding,’ ex­plains Matt. ‘We wanted to make her as in­volved as pos­si­ble. It felt like all three of us were get­ting mar­ried as she stood next to us. Af­ter Chris and I kissed, we turned and kissed her, too. It was an emo­tional, love-filled day.’

While the trio had a tra­di­tional cake and din­ner, they fin­ished up with a slightly less tra­di­tional rave on a boat – which was per­fect for them.

Even though things are plain-sail­ing these days, the throu­ple’s re­la­tion­ship throws up some curve­balls, par­tic­u­larly when it comes to bed­time. Chris says, ‘Things can get quite com­pli­cated. Matt and I used to sleep on op­po­site sides, and then Cait came along. If I wanted to stay on the same side, Cait would have to be in the mid­dle, and we found that she didn’t like that!’

Now the three of them have been liv­ing to­gether for two years, they’ve even dis­cussed the pos­si­bil­ity of chil­dren.

‘The nat­u­ral step to take next would be kids,’ says Matt. ‘But it might be a lit­tle while longer be­fore we do that. We have two dogs for now… and that’s enough!’

‘It’s dif­fer­ent strokes for dif­fer­ent folks...’

Cait was a big part of the cer­e­mony

Matt, Cait and Chris

Three’s not a crowd with this trio

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