Was I bit of a bounder letting pal film babe giving me BJ?
Wouldn’t you rather have COCK? And BUM BISCUITS?! I TURNED 30 last week and on Friday night I threw the best birthday bash ever. I invited loads of pals old and new and workmates, a lot of them women. About an hour into the party a girl I’d fancied ever since I saw her started to eye me across the lounge, inviting me to join the crowd dancing to my mate’s blaring house music. Unfortunately I needed a pee, and when I came back the cow had started dancing with some other lad while having a game of tonsil- tennis.
My mates all thought it was hilarious that I’d been blown out.
At about 3am I noticed the lad had passed out drunk and the girl wasn’t too pleased.
I was fairly pissed too, but thought this might be my best chance to shag her so I walked over and offered her the use of my bed for the night.
My only condition was that she gave me a blowjob and, to my surprise, she agreed.
In my bedroom she stripped, got YUSSSSS!!!! God yes, stick your veiny rolling pin up my moist LOVE BLANCMANGE!
down on her hands and knees and started to suck like a Dyson.
This girl was an expert and it was the best nosh I’ve ever had. She cupped my balls in one hand and rubbed the other up and down my shaft.
Then she started giving me the deep- throat, pretty much taking my entire length into her mouth.
She was concentrating so much that she didn’t hear my mate Paul come in.
So I’m sitting on the end of the bed, with a naked girl blowing me while my mate was giving me a thumbs- up in the corner of the room.
Paul sneaked in on tiptoes and I had to bite my tongue to keep from laughing as he got out his mobile and started taking pictures of her sucking me off.
Then he ran out onto the landing and passed his phone around, letting everyone who was still awake see what a dirty girl she was.
She was furious the next day, but I denied all knowledge of it. I feel a bit of a shit now. Was I?
EK, Cambs INVITING you for a dance and then going off with someone else at your party was a bit cruel, but she didn’t deserve to be totally humiliated like that. Now she will probably never speak to you again. MY girlfriend’s daughter is a tasty 19- year- old brunette. She’s always wearing skimpy clothes that show off her massive tits and lovely body. I’m 39 and I’ve been flirting with her since last year. A couple of weeks ago I saw her a pub. After a few drinks she started telling me about her sex life and how she likes older men. As I gave her a lift home she suggested that I park up at a secluded local beauty spot. As soon as I had turned off the engine she had my old man out. She gave me a blowjob before getting on the back seat. I took off her thong and went down on her before screwing her hard. I shagged her again a few nights later and we f** ked for four hours non- stop. It was great. Now she has suggested that we get a place together. I’m tempted. What should I do?
KP, Yorkshire YOU’VE got a hard time coming whatever you choose. Er… but I don’t want any bum biscuits… What is a bum biscuit? Bake Off’s got a good format, so, it’ll always survive presenter changes and the odd advert break.
But, if you ask me, it’s not a patch on Masterchef! The current Celebrity edition is great entertainment.
What’s your favourite baking or cookery based TV show?