READER PIC and loses HALF his face Drunk mum’s poo stops or­phans’ trip to zoo

Sunday Sport - - NEWS -

A DRUNK woman shat off a foot­bridge onto a minibus which was car­ry­ing OR­PHANS to a pet­ting zoo, a court heard.

Jane Wright, 41 ( right), had been swig­ging strong cider for break­fast at her home in Run­corn, Cheshire, and was on her way to the shops to buy more booze for an af­ter­noon ses­sion.

Mag­is­trates heard that on the way, mother- of- three Wright was “caught short” and defe­cated from the foot­bridge to the road­way 16 feet be­low.

Un­for­tu­nately, her stools landed on the minibus which was be­ing driven to a pet­ting zoo in North Wales.

The court heard that many of the chil­dren had never seen real an­i­mals be­fore and were thrilled WHEN busty Sally Perkins flipped out her busters in the mid­dle of the street she hardly raised an eye­brow…

Be­cause the Wat­ford stu­dent, 23, was vis­it­ing San Fran­cisco dur­ing the mid­dle of a gay pride event and, to put in bluntly, most men there were “just not in­ter­ested”.

Sally said: “It was my first time in San Fran­cisco and I loved it. What a place!” at the idea of watch­ing geese, sheep and pigs.

But the trip had to be can­celled af­ter vol­un­teer driver Tony Har­ris suf­fered a panic at­tack af­ter Wright’s stools landed on his wind­screen.

Wright pleaded guilty to pub­lic defe­ca­tion, in­de­cent ex­po­sure and en­dan­ger­ing a pub­lic con­veyance. She’ll be sen­tenced in Jan­uary. BURN­ING DE­SIRE: Henry Jones ad­mit­ted voyeurism WHEN Henry Jones was left half a mil­lion quid by his late mum, he wisely in­vested his in­her­i­tance in prop­erty.

But the 58- year- old wasn’t just af­ter a de­cent re­turn on his in­vest­ment – he also wanted to have a good old PERV.

Be­cause af­ter buy­ing four ad­join­ing ter­raced houses, he duly in­stalled pretty young fe­male ten­ants into three of them. And then he set to work SPY­ING on the girls. A court heard that for­mer ware­house­man Jones set up cam­eras hid­den in light fit­tings in bed­rooms and be­hind bath­room fit­tings.

But the louse came un­stuck when he went to bore another peep­hole be­tween the va­cant house and the bath­room of an oc­cu­pied prop­erty.

Jones used a 12” drill bit to get through the party wall but in his lust- crazed ex­cite­ment, nicked into a gas pipe.

And when he peered through the new hole to as­sess the dam­age, the gas went up in a sheet of flame, burn­ing half of Jones’s face off!

Mag­is­trates heard it was “a mir­a­cle” that the ter­race did not blow up.

A badly- in­jured Jones spent three months in hos­pi­tal dur­ing which time his spy cam­era net­work was dis­cov­ered by in­ves­ti­ga­tors sent to as­sess the dam­age.

Quizzed by po­lice, Jones con­fessed all – hav­ing what his lawyer de­scribed as a “spir­i­tual ex­pe­ri­ence” while he was re­cu­per­at­ing from his se­vere burns.

In court last week, sick Jones ad­mit­ted voyeurism.

Another charge of dam­ag­ing the gas sup­ply was left on file.

His so­lic­i­tor, Bernard Youlle, told Birm­ing­ham mag­is­trates his client was “truly sorry” for his ac­tions but had been “al­ready very se­verely pun­ished by fate” – hav­ing be­ing left badly scarred and sight­less in his right eye.

He will be sen­tenced in the New Year.

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