SHANE WAT­SON PEO­PLE WAT C H I N G

As Strict­ly­gate con­tin­ues to make the head­lines for all the wrong rea­sons, spare a thought for an in­no­cent hubby

The Daily Telegraph - Saturday - - COVER STORY -

e’re now into week three of Strict­ly­gate and it’s not get­ting any bet­ter for the “guilty” par­ties.

The story so far: Strictly Come Danc­ing dancer Katya Jones (pic­tured above be­ing in­ter­viewed with her celebrity dance part­ner, Seann Walsh, while her hus­band, Neil, far left, also a dancer on the pro­gramme, looks on) was caught in a clinch with Walsh af­ter a night on the tiles. Since then, the world has gone mad. You’d think the cou­ple had bro­ken into the Chil­dren in Need of­fices, stolen all the Pud­seys, and ended up for­ni­cat­ing un­der the statue of Churchill in full view of the Houses of Par­lia­ment. The days since their pave­ment snog have felt a bit like the cli­max of the Pro­fumo Af­fair, or Lewin­sky­gate, with ques­tions be­ing asked in high places, a pub­lic apol­ogy and state­ments from a judge (al­beit Strictly judge Craig Revel Hor­wood). And while Katya has stressed that ev­ery­thing is fine in the Jones mar­riage, this pic­ture – with Neil glow­er­ing in the back­ground – would sug­gest there’s a long way to go be­fore all is for­given. You can al­most read His thoughts, which go some­thing like this:

Thanks a bunch. Thank you very much. Ev­ery­one in front of me wants to know what I am do­ing with my face. Ev­ery­one watch­ing at home is scru­ti­n­is­ing my ex­pres­sion. I am not com­fort­able.

Do you think you could look a bit less happy? That smile does not look to me (or my mum) like the smile of a mar­ried woman con­sumed with re­gret. That smile is more of an op­por­tu­nity knocks smile, and I’m not the only one who thinks it.

I haven’t even got a celebrity part­ner. Let’s not for­get that small de­tail. You’ve got the celebrity (so called… no one had heard of Seann with all the Ns un­til you put him on the map), while I’m stuck in the cho­rus, nose pressed to the glass, wait­ing for my break. Where is the jus­tice?

A lot of peo­ple warned me… They said: “Watch That One, Neil, she’s got dirty dancer writ­ten all over her.”

That tele­vised apol­ogy you gave – our mar­riage is “ab­so­lutely fine” – thanks for noth­ing. Might as well have said Neil is a pleas­ant enough bloke. Cheers.

Like Craig Revel Hor­wood said. What you did, bot­tom line, Not Pro­fes­sional. Me, I am a pro­fes­sional. You, sorry to say, not at all.

No one is look­ing at the danc­ing now are they? All they’re look­ing for is con­tact. That’s your do­ing. You have dragged our craft into the gut­ter and made some­thing beau­ti­ful ugly.

And it’s such a cliché. I’d be em­bar­rassed. I am em­bar­rassed.

We haven’t even got on to what you were do­ing out on the lash, when you said you were go­ing to A Star Is Born, with your brother, and you’re meant to be do­ing Sober for Oc­to­ber and veg­gie on week­days.

The way I see it, you’ve made me look like a to­tal knob, and I’m not sure you’re both­ered.

DAG­GERS DRAWN Seann Evans and dance part­ner Katya Jones, with hus­band Neil back left

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