Positive steps

Try ‘talking up’ your mood

We’re often told that we’ll feel better if we think positive thoughts, and that our self-esteem will rise if we repeat positive statements such as “I’m a wonderful person”. But does this work?

The answer depends not only on your current mood, but also on the exact words you use. The bad news is that for those who most need to feel happier – those who are socially phobic and/or depressed, and those who ruminate on negative information – this technique can easily backfire.

People who suffer from ruminations – those who are plagued by persistent, unwanted, distressing thoughts or images – find that their own negative thoughts overshadow any positive suggestions they are offered. The thought that they may have inadvertently injured someone or that they’ve been contaminated in some way will seem far more plausible than a positive statement someone else has created. Similarly, social phobics – who avoid encounters because they fear that people will reject or criticise them – feel that their negative beliefs seem more plausible than any positive suggestion, even while admitting their worries are out of proportion to the actual threat posed.

Maree Abbott and Ronald Rapee at the University of Sydney demonstrated this neatly when they informed two groups, one composed of socially phobic individuals and the other of non-anxious people, that they had to give an impromptu speech and their performance would be evaluated. Participants were then asked to judge how well they thought they did right after their speech, and again one week later.

During the intervening week, they were also asked to record their thoughts. Abbott and Rapee found that those who suffered from social phobia not only recorded more negative thoughts, but also worried more about the appraisal, expecting criticism. The non-anxious participants felt increasingly positive about their performance.

Whether or not we’re self-confident, the content of our self-talk also matters. Joanne Wood and colleagues at the University of Waterloo presented the statement, “I am a lovable person”, to two groups, those with high self-esteem and those whose self-esteem was low. They asked some participants to repeat the statement to themselves, and some to consider why that statement might be true. Those with low self-esteem felt worse in both conditions, while those whose self-esteem was high felt even better, although not significantly so.

These studies tell us that if you hope to benefit from positive self-talk, you should create the mantra yourself, rather than relying on someone else’s. You need to come up with something you consider to be a realistic reflection of your assets.

Furthermore, if you suffer from low self-esteem, low mood and/or rumination, you may wish to consider a course of cognitive behaviour therapy first, so that when you evaluate your strengths and weaknesses, you’ll be more objective and balanced in your assessment.