TIPS FOR CARREFOUR WHAT TO AVOID

Tesco tends to dwell near the bottom when it comes to customer satisfaction. Here’s what Carrefour could avoid inheriting:

That implacable, almost mystical, ability to have run out of the one basic item – unsalted butter, chicken breasts, peas

– that you popped in for. Does it take them by surprise each day to find semi-skimmed milk popular?

Leaving cages full of stock and cardboard boxes right in the middle of aisles. I didn’t need to be able to see that shelf anyway!

Impossibly stupid deals. I came in for one jar of olives, so it doesn’t matter that it’s seven for £16. When I’m making an antipasti for the entire constituency, I’ll reconsider.

Looking as if the entire shop has been ransacked and hit by an earthquake – if ever you go in after rush hour.

Putting flowers right next to the front door. I’ll crush them with everything else that’s heavier to come.