Daisy introduced to Robot world
Something big is happening in the cow shed. I was idly gazing out the shed, taking a break from eating, pooing and making milk when two enormous shiny lorries pulled into the yard.
Now we are all used to the milk tanker, the cake wagon and vet’s van but these were something entirely new.
They open up the sides and the farm loader lifted two big lumps all wrapped in plastic. This was all supervised by the very excited farmer and an even more excited dairyman.
Now, as a herd, we are not over burdened by thrills and excitement. When the biggest event in your calendar is either a visit from the vet or the AI man, then anything out of the ordinary attracts quite a crowd.
Before long, most of the herd was trying to get a view of the proceedings. There were diverse opinions. Could it be a pair of suntan cabins for the farmers daughters? They were looking a bit pasty after the young farmers dance.
Maybe a supersize washing machine and tumble drier? No final decision was made and when they started up the parlour we all lost interest and wandered off to get milked.
The next day again another big surprise. The lumps were moved into the collecting yard and all through the day it was a hive of activity with banging clanging.
Some fairly colourful language, not from our dairyman for a change. Twice a day we wandered past it. At first the lumps got a bit of attention. We licked them, nothing. We sniffed them, nothing. We pooed on them, nothing. Well, when I say nothing, that obviously excludes the fairly colourful language and a few threats that suggested we would end up as burgers if we did not desist.
By the end of the third day we pretty much ignored them as we headed to the parlour.
Then on day four it all changed. Bright and early we all ended up as usual in the collecting yard but the parlour was not going. Something was up. New gates were in place, lights flashed on the big lumps. Well, this was all getting a bit much and then before you know it, I was persuaded behind a gate and into the lump.
Now what? I had a look round and was about to get really upset when lo and behold, a portion of concentrate appeared as if by magic in front of me.
I was not going to look a gift horse in the mouth so head down and eat. Then it happened from nowhere - some disembodied force cleaned my teats, actually not that unpleasant. Kind of a tickling. Then before you could say foul-mouthed dairyman, the milking cluster was attached.
I kept turning around to see where the dairyman was but he was nowhere in sight. It was just like being in the parlour but no dairyman. What is it? I think I will call it a Robot. I wonder if the name will catch on?
All milked out, the cluster came off. I stood waiting for another load of concentrate. I waited and waited, eventually got fed up and off I went.
The rest of the herd took a bit more convincing to go visit the Robot. Much colourful language ensued. However, by the end of the day even the new heifers had got the point and soon we were all queuing up.
I think the promise of concentrate every time you visit may have helped.
Now you would have thought that not having to get up and milk twice a day would have made our dairyman a really happy chappie.
And for the most part he was, until the alarm goes off on the Robot in the middle of the night and he has to come and fix it. I just love progress.
Next thing you know they will be milking sheep. But then what do I know, I am only a dairy cow.