The Mail on Sunday - You - - Food Sarah Wilson -

One of my daugh­ters has deleted me from her life. This has been the case for many years and I am dev­as­tated. I have worked hard to be there for my four chil­dren and grand­chil­dren, but my daugh­ter has de­cided I am not nec­es­sary in her life. My hus­band was se­ri­ally un­faith­ful and we had a very dif­fi­cult di­vorce when my daugh­ter was 16, her sis­ter 17 and our two sons were lit­tle. There was no fi­nan­cial sup­port from my hus­band so I strug­gled, work­ing part time. In the end my ex-hus­band and I man­aged to be friends. I still loved him but sadly he died at 61. My es­tranged daugh­ter was close to him. Peo­ple say she is an adult now and I should let it go. She has asked me not to con­tact her any more. Should I leave it or keep try­ing? I know how dev­as­tated you must feel about your daugh­ter – I am so sorry. As a sin­gle mother with four chil­dren and lit­tle money, life must have been very hard. As your sons were still young, a lot of your time would have been spent look­ing after them and per­haps your daugh­ter re­sented this be­cause she did not un­der­stand how dif­fi­cult it all was. Al­though it is com­pletely un­der­stand­able that you couldn’t con­tinue in your mar­riage, per­haps, as she was close to her fa­ther, she blamed you for the di­vorce as well, which is re­ally hard. She could also be griev­ing for his death and this is fu­elling her anger. But keep the door open. Write one more let­ter telling her you love her and that you will al­ways be there for her, and con­tinue to send birth­day and Christ­mas cards. Then see lots of your other chil­dren and grand­chil­dren and your friends. It is im­por­tant that you have a life and I hope that one day she may be part of it again.

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