Plonker Poulsen grinned after his mistake
THERE is nothing wrong with wearing a broad smile if you have just won the Lottery. Crack open the champers and say cheese.
You can get also away with it if you have just managed to pull that fit bird you thought was out of your league for so long. Or if you’re Ian Holloway.
But it is probably best not to break into a gigantic grin in the moments immediately after scoring an own goal at the World Cup.
But that was the unbelievable reaction of dithering Danish defender Simon Poulsen as he set his side on the way to Group E defeat at the hands of Holland.
The lanky left-back displayed the sense of direction of a woman driver when heading a harmless cross against the back of his team-mate Daniel Agger before it flew into his own net.
Apparently Poulsen has been linked with Glasgow Rangers in the past. On this evidence he looks perfect for Scottish football.
To be honest he did well just to find something to smile about. Four days in to South Africa 2010 and I’m thinking of offering my Sky+ planner to insomniacs.
Yesterday’s offerings were like a meal that got worse with each course.
Wesley ‘I’ll shoot from anywhere in the opposition half’ Sneijder and the rest of the Dutch needed that aforementioned helping head to get them on their way against the Danes.
The Lego nation are the lowestranked European side out in South Africa and they played like it, although they were only really put out of their misery five minutes from time by ‘Ugly Dutchling’ Dirk Kuyt.
After washing that lot down with an early afternoon beverage, I was ready to be excited. Japan and Cameroon clearly weren’t ready to excite me though.
Thirty-seven painful, teeth-pullingly dull minutes passed without incident before Cameroon finally had a shot. Japan responded with a goal from Honda after excellent work from Toyota, Nissan and Mazda. And that was that. Game over. I couldn’t back Cameroon (a team that seem intent on ignoring their one world-class player, Samuel Eto’o) or Japan to win League Two, let alone the World Cup. They’d come unstuck at Torquay on a Tuesday night.
Two courses down and one to go, Italy OAPs against Paraguay. A quick glimpse at the highlights revealed I missed another stinker.
Sadly that’s been the story of the tournament so far. With one notable exception . . . the Germans. It didn’t take them long to nail their towels to the sun-loungers did it?
Joachim Loew’s lads provided the finest display of the tournament to date when tearing Australia apart late on Sunday.
They were helped by the harsh dismissal of Tim Cahill (shame we didn’t get to see the silly corner flagpunching celebration), but Podolski, Klose and co look pretty handy.
That’s more than can be said for the matching wardrobe of their management team. Tight-fitting t-shirts under blazers? Come on chaps, it’s 2010. Get a collar!