Memoirs of a Madman*
OR the Madman desperately seeking that significant other, online dating avoids all the unnecessary fuss of getting to know someone face to face, only to discover during a date at a very expensive restaurant that you’re totally incompatible.
This thereby saves you both time and money – both of which are in precious short supply for the Madman.
Last week I stressed the importance of trying to strike a balance between honesty and salesmanship in your online dating ad.
The problem is that even when you’re being honest in your profile, people may misinterpret what you say.
During my extensive research for this column, I discovered that there is an online dating dictionary to decode what your profile says about you.
For example, phrases such as ‘adventurous’ are deciphered as ‘pervert’ and ‘modern man’ suggests ‘We’ll be splitting the bill 50/50’.
I can add a few more to these, since ‘good sense of humour’ in my experience equals ‘I’m David Brent’ and listing under ‘personal interests’ that you enjoy DIY says ‘I want to spend my Bank Holiday weekends wandering around Homebase with hollowed eyes or