Amer­ica the funny

The Peterborough Evening Telegraph - - Your Views -

I came across an an­nual list pub­lished by US news­pa­per the Wash­ing­ton Post in which read­ers are asked to sup­ply al­ter­na­tive mean­ings for com­mon words. Here are some of my favourites

Flab­ber­gasted (adj.), ap­palled over how much weight you have gained.

Ab­di­cate (V.), to give up all hope of ever hav­ing a flat stom­ach.

Willy-nilly (Adj.), im­po­tent.

Es­planade (V.), to at­tempt an ex­pla­na­tion while drunk.

Lymph (V.), to walk with a lisp.

Flat­u­lence (N.) emer­gency ve­hi­cle that picks you up af­ter you are run over by a steam­roller.

Balder­dash (N.), a rapidly re­ced­ing hair­line. Ab­so­lutely bril­liant and, more im­por­tantly, proof that post-Trump there is still hope for Amer­ica.

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