What not to say to a child­less woman over 50

The Sunday Telegraph - Stella - - CONTENTS -

il­lus­tra­tions: oli frape I’M OVER 50. I don’t have kids. And you would not be­lieve the clumsy, in­sen­si­tive and at times cruel things that have been said to me, not only by strangers but also fam­ily and so-called friends. As some­one who did want kids, it’s es­pe­cially in­fu­ri­at­ing – and if you think that your child­less friends aren’t also in­fu­ri­ated, then they just haven’t let you see it. I know they are, be­cause as some­one who has writ­ten a lot about this sub­ject, I’ve had plenty of peo­ple con­tact me pri­vately to thank me for do­ing so.

I know (most) peo­ple are just trying to make their child­less (I can’t em­brace the word ‘child­free’ yet) friends and loved ones feel bet­ter. Just trying to help and soothe. And that is kind and ap­pre­ci­ated and lovely. Thank you. I know how hard it is to see some­one you love in this kind of pain, es­pe­cially if you feel em­bar­rassed and awk­ward be­cause you do have chil­dren. It’s one of those sit­u­a­tions, yes, where you feel you can’t say the right thing. And that is sort of true. But if you can avoid say­ing any of the fol­low­ing, then at least you’re not going to make things worse. So here goes...

Newspapers in English

Newspapers from UK

© PressReader. All rights reserved.