Let’s reboot our TV classics, Wharf style

The Wharf - - News - AN­GELA CLARKE Fol­low An­gela on Twit­ter: @TheAn­ge­laClarke

Blonde’s Eye View With Sheridan Smith’s lat­est drama, Clean

Break, set in Ca­nary Wharf, it’s time we rethought our hum­ble lo­ca­tion.

We could take the op­por­tu­nity to re­brand. Why limit our­selves to The

Ap­pren­tice? We could be the cap­i­tal’s one stop shop for film­ing. Lon­don’s an­swer to LA. Hol­ly­wood Wharf.

All the tele­vi­sion classics could be re­born here: Up­stairs, Down­stairs. A heart­warm­ing tale of drama be­tween the floors of One Canada Square. The lives of the masters (of the uni­verse) up­stairs, and the staff (pretty much ev­ery­one else) down­stairs in­ter­twine, against a back­drop of se­ri­ous his­tor­i­cal events, like the col­lapse of Lehman Brothers, and the ar­rival of Krispy Kreme dough­nuts.

Mur­der, She Wrote. Crime writ­ing sleuth Jes­sica Fletcher comes to E14 to re­search a novel set in a Pret: The Corpse Eats at Mid­night (On The Last DLR Home). But six min­utes into the episode, a Star­bucks barista is dis­cov­ered dead un­der a pile of cof­fee stir­rers. With the help of the lov­able but in­ef­fec­tual es­tate se­cu­rity guard, Jes­sica works out who­dun­nit.

Only Fools & Horses. In this reboot, Del Boy af­fects the phrases and man­ner­isms of the up­wardly mo­bile hip­ster, by grow­ing a beard and hang­ing out in a juice bar in E14. Rod­ney flogs gluten free rolls, that ac­tu­ally con­tain gluten, to un­sus­pect­ing com­muters.

Game of Thrones. “Win­ter is com­ing” is the motto of House Stark, whose fam­ily spend too long stand­ing around the bot­tom of the glass tow­ers where the wind’s a bit nippy. Is that roar an ap­proach­ing dragon or the Ju­bilee line train?

The Of­fice. No changes.

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