VOYEURS. Avoid being arrested by wearing a hard hat and hi-viz vest and placing a yellow tripod outside the house or student flats of the ladies you wish to view. They will believe you are a surveyor and will happily remove their bra without concern.
Iwan Carr, Upper Llandwrog GENTLEMEN. Run out of clean grundies and need to know if you can re-use yesterday's? Use an old mining industry test and drape them over a canary's cage. If the bird doesn’t fall off its perch, you're good for another couple of days.
Graham, email. SWEETCORN kernels make ideal tooth replacements for chain smokers who’ve been fighting.
Daniel Slight, Grantham TRAMPS. Bring a touch of class to your street corner boozing by consuming a ‘Jeroboam' of cider.
Rolly Rogton, Bolton ARMY cadets. Get on the right side of your drill instructor by discreetly using your watch to reflect the sun on to your toe caps during morning inspections.
Nigel Kelly, Dromore