Find out why she’s be­hav­ing this way

Woman's Weekly (UK) - - Here To Help -

QI’m em­bar­rassed by my daugh­ter’s be­hav­iour and I don’t know how to raise this with­out her be­com­ing de­fen­sive and cross with me. A very close friend of hers, and of the fam­ily, was sud­denly taken ill. It was so bad, she had to get her three-year-old to fetch the phone be­fore she could even call for help. She was then taken into hospi­tal. She has three chil­dren, two of them school-age.

I know from my friend that my daugh­ter hasn’t been to visit or even of­fered any help. I thought I’d brought my chil­dren up to care for peo­ple. Why is she be­ing like this?

Tina, Lon­don

AI un­der­stand you feel dis­ap­pointed but, un­less you talk to your daugh­ter, you won’t know the rea­son. It’s also pos­si­ble your friend has not given you the cor­rect in­for­ma­tion. Mak­ing as­sump­tions and mind­ing about some­thing you haven’t ver­i­fied will only lead to up­set and fur­ther mis­un­der­stand­ings.

Ask your daugh­ter your­self about her friend’s sit­u­a­tion, and see what she says. Don’t at­tack her for her bad be­hav­iour – just lis­ten. If you still feel that some­thing needs to be said, then ex­plain why and how it made you feel. Telling off an­other adult rarely gets a pos­i­tive re­sult.

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