In­tro­verts en­joy hol­i­days in own way

In­tro­vert

Austin American-Statesman - - LIFE & ARTS - Con­tin­ued from Con­tact He­len Anders at 912-2590.

full of peo­ple vis­it­ing with each other, work a puz­zle or knit while you talk. The busy­work cre­ates “psy­chic space,” Dembling says.

4. At the mall, “hide in plain sight.” While oth­ers fran­ti­cally search for gifts, sit and peo­ple-watch. In­tro­verts do this very well.

5. About those gifts: “In­tro­verts are such deep thinkers,” Dembling says. “Ev­ery gift has to be per­fect.” So, she makes a lot of her gifts.

6. “Choose your par­ties, and don’t let any­one con­vince you the party’s go­ing to col­lapse if you leave,” she says. There’s an art to leav­ing a party, and, in fact, one of Dembling’s fa­vorite partyleav­ing gam­bits in­volves art. She and her hus­band, Tom, have a se­cret code: “Let’s look at the art.” They start mak­ing the rounds of the home, look­ing at the walls, and make their way to the door, from which they exit.

“It’s a lot eas­ier to en­joy par­ties if we don’t feel trapped,” she says. “Of course, at of­fice par­ties, you have to put your best foot for­ward and pre- tend to be an ex­tro­vert. At those, you really have to put on your clown nose.”

Then, af­ter the sea­son’s over, take a deep breath and plunge into the new year.

“I like the con­cept of a clean slate,” Dembling says, although she es­chews big horn-blow­ing New Year’s Eve par­ties for qui­eter cel­e­bra­tions — say, an evening look­ing at the night sky with just Tom.

In­tro­verts can, in­deed, sur­vive the hol­i­days, she says. It’s just a mat­ter of do­ing it their own way.

“There’s this con­cept that the ex­tro­vert way is the right way,” Dembling says. “No, it’s just a way. And our way is equally valid.”

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