Girl­friend’s daugh­ter pos­si­ble is­sue for man

Daily Local News (West Chester, PA) - - YOUR DAILY BREAK -

DEAR ABBY >> At 26, I am about to move in with my girl­friend, “Can­dace.” I love her so much, and I’m con­fi­dent she’s the one I want to marry. Can­dace has her 4-year-old daugh­ter, “Michelle,” with her most of the time we are to­gether. I’m con­fi­dent that mov­ing in to­gether is the right de­ci­sion, but liv­ing with Michelle makes me ner­vous. Although Michelle is smart and well­be­haved, like most kids, she can be bratty and de­mand a lot of at­ten­tion from Can­dace and me.

Can­dace has the ut­most pa­tience with Michelle, and I trust her abil­ity as a par­ent. What I’m wor­ried about is my own level of pa­tience. I don’t want kids any­time soon, and I get an­noyed with Michelle a lit­tle too eas­ily. What steps can I take to as­sure longevity in this re­la­tion­ship? — Young stepparent

DEAR YOUNG STEPPARENT >> Feel­ing as you do, I am not at all sure you should move in to­gether. I’m sur­prised that a man who doesn’t want kids any­time soon is so ea­ger to en­ter into a liv­ing sit­u­a­tion where that very thing is guar­an­teed. Be­fore chang­ing your liv­ing ar­range­ments, con­sider sign­ing up for par­ent­ing classes. They may not only give you in­sight into what to ex­pect, but also how to han­dle sit­u­a­tions that may arise.

DEAR ABBY >> I’m 13 and I have read your col­umn for quite some time. I en­joy it and like to share and dis­cuss some of the let­ters with my friends.

While I don’t al­ways agree with your an­swers, I al­ways learn some­thing new. I feel that this is the point of me read­ing your col­umn. I do, how­ever, have a prob­lem with a teacher who feels I should not be read­ing “adult ma­te­rial” in the paper, and should con­cen­trate on more “age ap­pro­pri­ate” things.

Would you please give me ad­vice on what to do or say to my teacher to make her un­der­stand this is not in­ap­pro­pri­ate ma­te­rial for a kid my age to be read­ing? I would re­ally ap­pre­ci­ate it, and I’ll do what­ever you say.

— Wayne in New York

DEAR WAYNE >> My col­umn has a read­er­ship that spans all ages. I know that be­cause I re­ceive let­ters from in­di­vid­u­als from 9 to 90.

Your par­ents should de­cide what read­ing ma­te­rial is ap­pro­pri­ate for you — not your teacher, as well-mean­ing as she may be. When I was grow­ing up, no lit­er­a­ture in our home was off lim­its to me or my brother, and any ques­tions we asked re­ceived straight­for­ward an­swers. I hope it’s the same for you, be­cause chil­dren learn their fam­ily’s val­ues through frank and open com­mu­ni­ca­tion. DEAR READ­ERS >> It’s time for my an­nual re­minder that day­light sav­ing time ends at 2 a.m. Sun­day — so don’t for­get to turn your clocks back one hour be­fore bed­time.

Dear Abby is writ­ten by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www. or P.O. Box 69440, Los An­ge­les, CA 90069.

Abby shares more than 100 of her fa­vorite recipes in two book­lets: “Abby’s Fa­vorite Recipes” and “More Fa­vorite Recipes by Dear Abby.” Send your name and mail­ing ad­dress, plus check or money or­der for $14 (U.S. funds) to: Dear Abby, Cook­book­let Set, P.O. Box 447, Mount Mor­ris, IL 61054-0447. (Ship­ping and han­dling are in­cluded in the price.)

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